19 Puns That Only Desis Will Understand

Keep calm and curry on.

1. Which tree is always wearing an undershirt?

2. Why is it so expensive for Ravana to go clubbing?

Because the cover charge is Rs. 5,000 per head.

3. Why are desi bananas so lonely?

Because they are all a-kela.

4. What did Dominos pizza say to make its competitors go away?

Pizza HUT!

5. At a job interview at Microsoft, the interviewer asked the applicant to “name four versions of Java.”

Desi response: “Mar java, mit java, lut java, mai sadkay java.”

6. Why do desis get offended every time they take out the trash?

Because they think this sign is swearing at them:

7. Why did the desi astronaut send a rose to the moon?

Because he loved gulab ja-moon.

8. What did one milk carton say to the other?

“What’s up, dood?”

9. How do fat desis get to work?

On motacycles.

10. Why do all the vegetables have a crush on the eggplant?

Because its body is bangain.

11. Why do desis eat when they’re stressed?

Because they were told this:

12. What’s the biggest contradiction in Tamil cinema?

Rajnikant. Because there’s nothing Rajni can’t do.

13. What did one pea say to the other?

I don’t know, they were muttering.

14. What type of bread stays complete, even if you eat it?


15. What do true Bollywood fans eat?

16. Why is selling mangoes considered a humble profession?

Because mangoes are sold by the aam aadmi.

17. What do the police do to people who steal eggs?

Put them unda arrest.

18. What do you call the Indian emblem?

19. What is a desi’s favorite type of cheese?


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Rega Jha is the editor of BuzzFeed India and is based in Mumbai.
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