For All Those Who Have Watched The Pregnancy Project On Netflix

"Lifetime movies are the best!" -Satan

It begins with a familiar face

Hey, don't I know her from somewhere?

It's Carmen from Spy Kids!

Our parents can't be spies. They're not cool enough!

It's Julie from Sleepover!

Oh for the love of carbs do we have to?

Now it's Gabby Rodriguez

James Dittiger

To be pregnant, or not to be pregnant

It started with a book.

It's a memoir!

The real Gaby Rodriguez:

A true story about a teenager who challenged stereotypes by faking her own pregnancy.

And then the movie came along, and nobody cared

Because it is a lifetime movie

But then it was released on Netflix

Damn you New Releases column. Damn you.

And it was just as bad as we thought it would be

Thanks Lifetime for wasting an hour and twenty nine minutes of our very productive lives

We have questions, Lifetime

Lots and lots of questions

First: "Go inside mom, I'm trying to make out with my girlfriend."

And his mom WENT INSIDE SO HE COULD MAKE-OUT WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND. WHAT HAS THE WORLD COME TO?????

And then they make out on the front lawn in their neighborhood

Get a room!

She tells her boyfriend to show her mom his condoms

This may in fact be the most awkward encounter in the entire world. Yep. This definitely wins.

His wallet was stuffed with condoms

Jim Corwin

Fun fact: wallets are not the best place to keep condoms because they are more likely to get punctured. Take that Gaby!

Getting pregnant is the easiest thing in the world?

Like easier than breathing? Eating? Writing your name?

Pregasauras Patheticus

Smooth. Super smooth

She is bonding with a pregnant girl over their pregnancies, but she is not really pregnant?

HAHA fooled ya!

And all for a high school project?

The most work I had to do in high school was take care of a baby doll who cried occasionally for three days. Where does she go to school?

Let's dance!

While we fool all our friends and family, creating a fake belly for me to wear around school! Hahah, we are going to get them good!

If all your friends jumped off a bridge, would you?

I'd rather jump off a bridge than have people see me all pathetic. How high was that bridge? Did you want to die, or jump off a bridge into a body of water at like an amusement park?

That is a bit extreme dear.

I'm going to bed before either of you come up with another clever idea to get us killed - or worse, expelled.

Insert melodramatic music

You taught me how to do science, let me do science!!!

You have been in my class for three years, you babysat my kids

Don't they get new teachers each year? Isn't that a conflict of interest for her to babysit his kids? WHERE DOES SHE GO TO SCHOOL?

Insert upbeat pop song

Wow Gaby, stereotypes do hurt people. You go girl. Curtains close on powerful applause.

Mean kid looks like Orin!

Do you know how you are going to die?

And finally after one hour and twenty nine minutes,

Gaby changed the world and empowers people everywhere to break stereotypes! Hip-hop is my passion. I love to pop, and lock, jam and break! Standing hand in hand making our dreams come truuuuuuuueeeee