What’s Your Celebrity Rage Gauge?

Don't make me go over there. Just take this quiz already!

Question #1

You catch your partner in the arms of another down the local shopping mall. The first thing you do is?

• Berate the pair of them for roughly twenty minutes. Then sock your partner right in the kisser
• Take aim and fling your mobile phone at the homewrecker
• Go home, and deflate his or her tyres
• Go home, and prepare your weapon of choice
• Hit the local bar and take out your anger on the most drunk person in the bar before proceeding to get drunk yourself.

Question #2

You have just come out of the gym and discover that two cars have boxed your car in. What do you do?

• In as systematic a manner as possible give out and complain to everybody near you, and then repeat this process inside the gym
• Throw your phone at the first car. Retrieve it, and fling at the second car
• Leave a post-it on both the cars windscreens and take a bus home
• Find the nearest traffic cone and proceed to total both cars before fleeing the scene
• Build yourself up for a fight before you notice that both of the offending drivers are trained cage fighter

Question #3

Your friend persuades you to hire his cousin for a moving job. The guy turns out to be pretty clumsy - he even drops a box with your family crystal in it. What do you do?

• Even though this cousin seems to be a nice guy you have to let him have it
• Call the cousins company and get him fired. Then get your friend fired too. Throw your phone at the cousin.
• Shrug your shoulders, all material things are ephemeral joys after all
• Rub the cousin's face in the broken shards of glass like a bold puppy who’s soiled the good rug. And shoot the puppy for good measure
• This cousin's pretty small. You can take him.

Question #4

At a karaoke night with friends your partner pokes fun of your singing. You thought your voice was pretty good. Most of your friends heard the comment. What do you do?

• He/she should have known better, but save the fisticuffs for when you get him/her home.
• Give him/her a black eye with the microphone before storming out. Throw your phone at him as you exit the room.
• Laugh it off; withholding sex is a much more appropriate mode of punishment
• By all counts the microphone cord is too thin to be effective for some instructive strangulation. Let this one slide
• Mock his/her sexual performance as loudly as possible so that all your friends hear it

Question #5

Your boss calls you into his office. He tells you one of your co-workers receives a promotion before you do, even though you have been with the company longer. You react by…

• Mocking your boss with a silly voice, call him an amateur. Punch out your promoted co-worker
• Throwing the stapler at your boss’s eye. Doesn’t he know who you are?
• Enough is enough! Send their paperclips flying, change the de-caff coffee to full caff on the sly, lower their office chair, and give them stern looks all day long. That’ll show them!
• Eying up your bosses letter opener for a full five minutes after he tells you the news. Then exit his office while humming a tune under your breath
• Leaving angry voicemails on their machines, but forget to turn off caller ID

Your Quiz Result:

Congratulations you are Christian Bale!

You're a nice guy! However your method acting has enabled you to be in touch with your true deepest rage and you are happy to share this with anyone who happens to stir your coffee just the wrong way, walk in your general vicinity or is a close blood relation. You are comfortable using expletives, yet your general delivery is reminiscent of kindergarten fight.

Your Quiz Result:

Congratulations you are Naomi Campbell!

You’re pretty, but you’re pretty angry. You have embraced the benefits of always keeping in touch by carrying a couple of phones. It means that you’ll always have a handy projectile to throw at disobedient minders, housekeepers and fellow air passengers. Your boots were made for community service!

Your Quiz Result:

Congratulations you are Bjork!

Like the seismic plates of your homeland you are a quiet and calm character with a penchant for shocking through fashion and music rather than aggression. However, once in a blue lagoon your volcano will erupt and you strike where people least expect you to!

Your Quiz Result:

Congratulations you are Phil Spector!

Years of lunacy have been brewing under that crazy hair and behind those staring eyes waiting for the right moment to strike. Swap the wall of sound for concrete cell walls. Be careful if your fellow inmate invites you to stumble upon his gun.

Your Quiz Result:

Congratulations you are Alec Baldwin!

Age, size or relationship does not mean you hold back! You are happy to bully those closest to you to get at someone else you are angry with. Phrases like “selfish” and “pig” may be used in your general stream of invective.