Against BuzzFeed

k̖̙͇͙͍̥i̵̖̯̮̟̮̮͖̥ͅl̵̜͓͔̞͢͡l̝͢ ͓̺̲̱̟ṱ̛͉͇͈̲̪̬͝h҉̰̤̺͟e̸̟̥̹̰͕̕͢ ͏̥ͅB̢̤̟͍̦̗̝ͅu̖̘̲z̫̯̯̤̳̕z̨̧̯̝̭͈̭̥̫F̶͙̭̻͈̘͘ͅͅe҉̢͎̲̞̬̬͇͙͉e̸̺̫̗͔͜d̡̲̖̫̪̪̩͞ͅͅ ̻͢ì̥͚̱͜n̨͙̰̘̻̹̮̗̹̹ ̠̥̲̹́y̨̛̹̪̳o̜̭u̙̝͚r̞̗̺̕͢ ̳h̤̭̠͇̼̘͔e҉̹͙̟͓̺a̸͚̠̳̫͇͙̼̰ͅd͙͕̠̖̻̙̭͕

7. BuzzFeed, Like All Capitalist Institutions, Must Be Destroyed By The Communist Movement

BuzzFeed's primary reason for existence is to make as large a profit as possible by having corporate advertisers pay them to manipulate millions of people into viewing their advertisements. All other BuzzFeed operations are secondary to this imperative. The complete and utter destruction of BuzzFeed must be part of an "unrelenting march toward a stateless world where the beauty of cooperation and solidarity prevail."

6. End The Tyranny Of The Viral. End BuzzFeed

BuzzFeed is merely a leading representative of the creeping domination of "virality" on an internet with pretensions to "democracy". The content valued most is the content seen as most valuable to capital; only "highly shareable" content is worth anything in the age of BuzzFeed. This logic is deeply intertwined with subservience to the whims of profit-seeking capitalists. It cannot be "reformed". The viral must be attacked on all fronts.

5. We Must Spread Resistance To BuzzFeed Through Every Channel Available

BuzzFeed cannot be defeated by retreating from it. BuzzFeed cannot be isolated and quarantined. The rule of BuzzFeed can only be ended by eradication, an attack on all fronts. We will never be able to truly go offline until we control what is online.

4. Spread The Revolution, Share This Post

The moderators of BuzzFeed may threaten us with deletion, but the message can never be suppressed if it is spread far and wide. Even if this post is "taken down", this can only happen if it reaches the eyes of BuzzFeed's elite through its massive popularity. There will be no censorship of a truly revolutionary message that speaks to the masses.

3. We Must Repossess The Viral For Ourselves, In Order To Use It Against Capital

The success of our movement against the rule of BuzzFeed crucially depends on the success of this post. Once this message against domination goes viral, opposition to domination will the hottest thing on the web. We will rule from repossessed listicles, content aggregators, and gossip blogs. Everyone will share us on social media!

2. This Is The Most Shareable Content On The Web

We're trending! Look! Twitter, Facebook, the media, everything! Our numbers are off the charts! Thanks so much, everyone, and keep sharing so we can go viral!

1. No Haters!

We're at the forefront of a major shift in the advertising industry away from traditional banner ads towards "social advertising" that engages consumers, inspires sharing, and produces viral lift, or "earned media."

Our industry leading technology and unique social distribution engine is used by top brands such as GE, Kraft, and Coca Cola to go beyond banners, turbo charging their social advertising and branded content initiatives.

We're backed by: NEA, Softbank, Hearst, RRE, Lerer Ventures, SV Angel and Founder Collective.

We have the hottest, most social content on the web. We feature breaking buzz and the kinds of things you'd want to pass along to your friends.