1. Scrotums* are (usually) not coated in delicious coconut flakes.
7. The hair does not naturally gather in one place like a bushy little mustache.
14. Or funky red sailor pants.
Although they do sometimes give you the side eye and wave hello.
15. A penis will not wish you happiness, at least not verbally.
Although if a penis could talk, it would probably talk in puns.
16. A penis of this size will not actually fit in a human ear.
No matter how stretchy the ear.
17. While veins do sometimes creep up like spindly branches, they are not steel grey.
25. The human body to penis ratio here is completely OFF.
And don’t let ANYONE tell you otherwise.
27. Nor is this.
28. The shading shown here, or chiarascuro if you will, inches closer to realism.
30. Finally, a set of cupcakes that most accurately represents the super fun variety that penises of all shapes and sizes can come in.
Erect, not erect, circumcised, uncircumcised. Every penis is unique!
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