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44 Things All Mexicans Know To Be True

Chilaquiles, Pedro Infante, and La Lotería are just a few.

1. Lotería was the game to play before you even heard of "Bingo."

2. Telenovelas will forever be a staple of Spanish-language television.

3. Mexico is a hotbed of cinematic excellence.

4. Maria Felix is the most beautiful woman in history.

5. Pedro Infante will always be the best of Los Tres Gallos.

6. And seriously, you'll never forget this classic scene that defined Mexican cinema.

7. Nobody talked faster, wittier, and funnier than Mario Moreno "Cantinflas."

8. Yes, you know your TV is permanently glued to Televisa and TV Azteca.

But alternatives exist as well.

9. You can't help but feel like a kid all over again when Xavier López Rodríguez speaks in his Chabelo voice.

10. Chespirito's characters will always take you back to your childhood no matter how old you are.

11. The song El Raton Vaquero by Cri Cri was the first time you heard someone speak English.

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12. La Virgen de Guadalupe is probably the most important religious icon in Mexico.

13. Your grandma will always remind you of the time she took the pilgrimage to La Basilica de Guadalupe.

14. You'll always remember where you were when Paco Stanley got shot.

15. The death of Selena will always make you cry.

16. Luis Donaldo Colosio was Mexico's JFK.

17. A dance party isn't a dance party without Los Angeles Azules.

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18. You'll shiver at the sight of one of these three items.

19. Jingling bells means El Paletero has arrived to save the day.

20. If you had a birthday cake, you knew what was coming next.

21. You develop a sense of rhythm practically at birth.

22. Otro Rollo was the original late night talk show.

23. Whistling at people is a totally acceptable way to get their attention.

24. But this hand gesture is not acceptable.

25. Edgar's misstep will always make you laugh no matter how messed up it is.

26. Who can forget about El Dueño de la Canaca?

27. And the power of the "iFUAAAAA!"?

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28. Unfortunate but true: La mordida.

29. It's totally acceptable to break out into a ranchera song when you're drunk.

30. The high flying people of Papantla will always make your palms sweaty.

31. Mexicans know how to take fireworks to the next level.

32. Torta de tamal will cure your hangover.

33. And so will menudo.

34. Oaxaca and Puebla will always battle it out for the best mole sauce in the world!

35. Chilaquiles are the ultimate breakfast of champions.

36. Tacos de suadero will always be amazing.

37. Siempre en Domingo on Sunday nights seemed to go on forever.

38. La Seleccion will forever be there to lift your spirits or break your heart.

39. A little Mexican ingenuity goes a long way.

40. El Super Classico will always break up families and friendships.

41. But Tigres vs. Monterrey will forever be el Clásico Regiomontano.

42. José Ramón Fernández is the most respected sports journalist in Mexico.

43. Lucha Libre will always remain classy.

Always...

44. And finally, MEXICANS ARE SIMPLY AWESOME.

¡AY GUEY!

Number 30 has been changed to better represent my people. Thanks, Lailan!