In an effort to assist what the New York Rangers apparently perceive to be an uninformed female fanbase, the Rangers posted a “Girl’s Guide to Watching the Rangers” on the Blueshirts United section of their official website today. The guide was written by a community contributor, but after fierce criticism in the comments section and on Twitter by female and male Rangers fans alike, it was yanked from the website less than 90 minutes after it was published. This is why:
3. RULE 1: Every red-blooded male in the world loves sports, so girls better get used to it so the human race can survive.
Actual text the New York Rangers organization published: “When having either guy friends, brothers, boyfriends or husbands in your life, watching games in any sport becomes unavoidable…. News of the NHL lockout’s end caused as much excitement in the male world as a 70 percent off sale does in a woman’s.”
4. RULE 2: Don’t bother asking men to explain everything to you, just have a vague understanding of the game.
Actual text the New York Rangers organization published: “You can tell if something huge has happened by their reaction, and if you’re absolutely lost, wait for the replay. There’s always a replay after a major play. Still confused? Wait until a penalty or other whistle to ask…. Everything else? Not important in your world … yet.”
5. RULE 3: Try to learn some of the player’s names to fit in.
Actual text the New York Rangers organization published: “I’m not asking you to memorize a yearbook, but after watching a game or two, last names will start to sound familiar.”
6. RULE 4: Henrik Lundqvist is your new personal savior.
Actual text the New York Rangers organization published: “If New York were to have a new face on every quarter [currency], it would be his…. Don’t you want to watch him do well? Don’t you want to watch when he’s on the ice? My point exactly.”
Henrik Lundqvist, he of the 3.46 goals against average (25th in the NHL), RIGHT UP THERE WITH WASHINGTON AND LINCOLN!
7. CONGRATULATIONS! Male Ranger fans will now likely allow you to watch along in their presence.
Actual text the New York Rangers organization published: “If you feel too forced and uninterested, at least know the Rangers’ schedule so you can schedule a girl’s night for those times. Oh, and one last thing: don’t give the guys grief for their playoff beards.”
Female Rangers fans were understandably disappointed.
- Bitterly cold temperatures and arctic winds began freezing large swathes of the U.S. Northeast ❄️