neil

Neil

Hi, I'm Neil. Through a tragic accident, I ended up stuck in Hyrule -- the land you may know from the Legend of Zelda. I'm here to tell you: It kinda blows to live there.

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  • A teddy bear taking a selfie
  • A wooden post sticking out of the grass
  • A rainbow unicorn with an arrow pointing upward for a horn
  • A little cowboy with a big 'number one' hat crying for joy
  • Moses wearing sunglasses holding a list article carved into a tablet
  • Clipboard with a piece of paper on it that says 'do it to em', 'get stuff done', and 'be a legend'
  • The number one hundred thousand under a small green monster
  • The number two hundred and fifty thousand under an alien
  • The number five hundred thousand amongst a forest of eyeballs
  • The number one million on the earth, being watched by a planet sized eyeball
  • A person with their palms facing forward, wearing an uncooked turkey on their head
  • Butterflies flying around a pair of lips
  • A body builder cat flexing with 2022 written across its pecs
  • Snow White smiling serenely while looking at a bird that is perched on her hand
  • The golden snitch flying through the air
  • A green slime splatter
  • K-pop 'finger heart'
  • Funky disco dancer
  • A cat looking startled to see a human dressed as a cat eating from its bowl, labelled "Karen"
  • Two slimy tentacles touching and forming a heart shape
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  • 10 Things That Suck About Living In Hyrule

    Look, I know the original Legend of Zelda looks like it'd be a cool place to be forced to live in, with all the magic, vast landscapes, crazy creatures, hot fairies and princesses, but it's overrated. People are always like, "Neil, you live there, that's so awesome, you are so lucky dude!" Well, trust me folks, there's plenty about this place that does not rule. Actually, it was kind of hard to narrow it down to an even 10, but I gave it my best. You are hereby officially warned -- let me know if you have other thoughts about what else would suck about living in the game by adding them in the comments below!

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