7 Scientific Reasons Diagonally Cut Sandwiches Are Better

This is the result of a 31-year personal study I have conducted.

1. The diagonally sliced half is optimized for dipping in a variety of soup containers.

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2. Mutual support in a vertical setting maintains overall structural integrity in the hours leading up to lunch.

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3. Hypotenuse length maximizes tongue-to-sandwich-filling contact area.

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4. Longer fissure span means increased chance of creating a melted Cheese Bridge.

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5. Triangle structure creates an obvious grab zone.

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6. Acute corners allow for four perfect initial sandwich bites.

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7. The initial corner consumption sets up two ultimate bites of unmatched, crustless perfection.

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Please submit any rebuttals below for peer review.

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