We recently asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to tell us the stupidest ways they have broken their computers. Here are their stories.
1. Try not to cook your laptop.
I used my computer as a plate in the microwave when I was drunk.
Submitted by margoe4715adf1a
2. Seriously, most technology is not edible.
I was making dinner and using a recipe I found online. I was in a new apartment and had my notebook laptop on top of an unused burner while I had something roasting in the oven. I smelled plastic and thought, "whatever, it's a new recipe". I lifted my laptop and the bottom was melted to the oven and all the hardware was exposed. Flambéed laptop was not intentionally on the menu.
Submitted by ashal2
3. #StopCookingLaptops2k15
My family went away on holiday, and my cousin needed to charge her laptop on the first night. She popped it on top of the hot plate in the room, plugged it into the same multi-plug that the hot plate was plugged into, and switched the whole thing on, not realising that the last person to use the hot plate had just switched it off at the wall instead of turning the heat control off. We left the rooms for dinner and when we returned, her laptop had melted through completely.
Submitted by Megan Sharland, Facebook
4. Don't whip your hair too enthusiastically.
My sophomore year of college, my roommate and I were making fun of Willow Smith's song "Whip My Hair". I whipped a little too hard, and my laptop flew off my lap and crashed onto the floor. Not my proudest moment.
Submitted by Meredith Saucier, Facebook
5. Keep in mind that sometimes, even ants can't save you.
I dropped a hot bowl of mashed potatoes on my laptop keyboard. The keys all press themselves now. I put the laptop outside to try to save it by letting the ants eat the mashed potatoes, but the damage had already been done. The ants did a good job cleaning it out, though.
Submitted by Phosphorus Iodine Phosphorus, Facebook
6. Never trust a cleanly infant.
I was babysitting my cousin's son who was 3 or 4 at the time and had an obsession with cleaning EVERYTHING. Laptop was on the coffee table, glass of water on the end table. I left the room for no more than 3 minutes to use the bathroom. When I re-entered the room, it was already too late; he had dumped the whole glass of water on the laptop. I yelled, "Seth, NO!" and the poor kid burst into tears and said, "I just wanted it clean it for you!" He's 13 now, I think it's time to embarrass him a little in front of his friends.
Submitted by MissAlexis
7. Don't trust raccoons, either.
I was visiting back home (Alaska) and left my MacBook on the patio while I went inside to eat before going outside to roast marshmallows but a loud noise alarmed me first… a raccoon got to it and ripped all the keys off and in doing so played the YouTube video I was watching. He clearly disliked the video because he pissed all over the laptop and flipped it off the table. Asshole.
Submitted by nursenhowell
8. Don't be too whimsy.
I broke my laptop dancing in the rain. I was waiting for a ride home from class at my university and it was raining and so I jumped in the puddles like the toddler I am and when I got home I realized my backpack was soaked through and my laptop was dead.
Submitted by lucygracer
9. And don't forget that your laptop isn't a cutting board.
My desk was overflowing and I was going to cut some cardboard with a hobby knife. I decided to use my computer as my cutting board. Needless to say, I pushed that knife a bit too deep into the cardboard.
Submitted by ingeborghavarsteina
10. Be aware of the dangers of Britney Spears.
I was watching Crossroads, with Britney Spears, and I put my glass of wine down on it to dance to "I Love Rock 'n' Roll" and got a little too into it. The wine spilled all over the keyboard and that was the end of that.
Submitted by breallyn
11. Always have chips with you, so if something goes wrong, at least you have chips.
I was trying to go grab a bag of chips to munch on before bed, but the lights were off and I tripped over my laptop cord. I flew forward and hit my chin on the laptop screen. The screen shattered and pieces of glass were stuck in my chin. I ate my chips while I wanted for the ambulance.
Submitted by nataliek4dec30ef1
12. Remember that Uno is a game of passion.
A friend of mine lost an Uno tournament one night and in a fit of rage spilled a mimosa on my computer which was providing the soundtrack nearby. Monday nights used to be so much fun.
Submitted by lauraf36
13. Try not to cash in all your bad karma at once.
Leaving school, I put my laptop on the top of my car while loading my backpack into the back seat. While I was driving, I noticed something fly off of my car, and I realized that it was my laptop. Thankfully, it hadn't been hit by any cars by the time I managed to turn around. As I was picking up the pieces, I heard a sound from behind me. I turned around to see my car rolling down into a ditch. I was found in the foetal position, crying in the driver's seat while waiting for my mother to help me out of the ditch.
Submitted by Andymcgeagh
14. And try not to be too sad.
Not me, but a friend got really homesick her first month of college and cried so much on her MacBook track pad that she gave it water damage.
Submitted by Elle_Claire
15. And, for the love of god, KEEP AWAY FROM LIQUIDS.
My brother spilled a can of Pepsi on his school laptop. Had to send it away to get fixed. The day he got it back he spilled a glass of milk on it.
Submitted by weekdaywarrior
16. Especially alcoholic liquids.
I spilled RumChata on my trackpad. Then the cursor proceeded to act drunk for three months.
Submitted by angelas43b1f4570
17. And especially ironic liquids.
I drunkenly spilled apple juice on my MacBook. Yes, I see the irony of spilling apple juice on my Apple product...ugh...
Submitted by Gina-Marie Martinelli, Facebook
18. The TL;DR version:
Wine.
Submitted by Victoria Vast, Facebook
19. Lastly, if you do break your laptop, don't do it in vain.
My tightwad parents still had us on a Windows 98 in 2004. It couldn't even connect to the internet. I went into the control panel and just deleted a bunch of random stuff to crash it so they had to buy us a new one. I blamed my 10-year-old brother who had a history of messing with things he didn't know about on the computer. They totally bought the story and bought us a new computer.
Submitted by Amelia R. Flurer, Facebook
Note: Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.