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So you like shopping?
I mean, come on. Who doesn't?!
It's always been a special bond shared between you and your friends.
And let's face it. You could ALWAYS use a good spree every now and then.
When you first get there, it all seems fun and games. Laughing and sunshine. Rainbows and unicorns.
But in reality, there are actually a lot of emotions that accompany a day at the mall.
First off, you and your friends map your path, figuring out exactly what stores to hit and when.
And it's always the same. You daydream of the day you can actually afford something from the Meccas of the fashion world.
But let's be real. Since you ain't got none of this:
You'll never step foot in one of these:
Unless you're prepared to do a lot of this:
And way more of this:
So once you've accepted your status of peasantry, you march on over to your safe haven: Forever21.
This store is perfection. You walk in, and you just KNOW you're coming out a really happy camper.
At this point, on the emotional scale, you rate "Kristen Bell Meeting a Sloth."
Because honestly, Forever21 is the best thing to happen to this world since our Lord and Savior Beyoncé was born.
And the best part is, YOU CAN AFFORD IT ALL!
Hey wait, that shirt on the mannequin way down there looks super cute! Let me just run the length of a football field to get to the other side of the store to reach it!
But by the time you get there, you have to duel someone to the death for the last Small.
Obviously, you come out victorious, albeit slightly bruised. But then the terror settles in... You've lost your friends.
Oh stop with the melodramatics, you reunite with them in the dressing room .5 seconds later.
Cut to: inside the dressing room. The dress is on, you're dancing in the mirror, checking out your butt from all different angles.
So you go out to your friends, making the big reveal like you're some kind of untouchable goddess, and they should weep at your feet because they are your inferiors.
Because on the Kim K scale, you're at "pre-Northsoutheast West body with extra cleavage" Kim.
But on that same scale, your friend is on "super bitch mode" Kim, where she thinks her honesty is something you would truly value.
Luckily for you though, you DGAF.
Other times though, you might actually WANT their honesty to save you from yourself.
But then when it comes time for you to continually reassure your skinny, pretty friend that she is NOT, in fact, a fat, hideous monster, you just cannot even.
But in the end, you guys band together and have a good cry over how thin you all were in elementary school and how life will never be good again.
All in all, it was a good day shopping with your friends.
And of course, it never hurts when you can justify going back again tomorrow.
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