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The Glorious, Fabulous Lives Of The Real House Poms Of Beverly Hills

On this episode: Jiff and Giggy meet up to talk charity when things go unexpectedly and totally wrong. DRAMA.

Scene: Giggy the pom is hanging out in his luxurious home in Beverly Hills. The weather is nice. Giggy is waiting for his famous friend, Jiff, to come over to discuss a charity project.

1. *Door bell rings*

2. It’s Jiff. Jiff and Giggy know each other through Giggy’s mutual Wiccan yoga friend.

3. The two are meeting to discuss their work on a future charity project involving clean air in northern Canada.

4. “Oh well hello, this is quite beautiful,” Jiff says beside the pool.

5. “You have a beautiful house, Giggy.”

6. “Thanks Jiff. I know. Enough about my giant home and incredible view, let’s talk about saving people and clean air in Canada. I love charity.”

7. *The two take a seat*

8. “Lisa, darling, please. I need you.”

9. “Lisa?”

10. “Yes, she’s the help. Lisa baby darling girl love, please, I need some food for my guest.”

11. *Lisa brings the goods*

12. The two sit in silence.

13. “Jiff, what can we do to help all those people without clean air in Canada?”

14. “We could organize an event and I could entertain them.”

15. “There are a number of extremely fabulous things that I can do.”

16. *The help arrives to take the exhausted poms to ‘Second Tea’”*

17. “This is absolutely lovely, Lisa. Thank you. You know me so well. Now run along.”

18. *Two other random pom-wives appear*

19. *The two pom-wives ambush Jiff. They’re screaming at Jiff because he isn’t co-chairing their charity function to benefit leftover lizards in southern California*

20. “GET OUT. GET OUT. GET OUT. LISA, WHY DID YOU LET THEM IN? This is TOTALLY and UTTERLY inappropriate”

21. *Muffled barks*

22. COMMERCIAL BREAK

23. “Ugh. I am shvitzing. Those women. How dare them. They don’t own you Jiff. This is about me and my charity.*

24. *Jiff casually takes out his one-of-a-kind Ellen hoodie*

25. “Anyway, maybe we could donate this to charity?”

26. *Jiff walks to the piano* Jiff speaks, “Yes, or maybe I could play the piano. I love sharing my talents. Does this piano have autotune?”

27. *Giggy shakes his head. The two sit next to each other on an ottoman. It’s really awkward. The silence speaks so loud.*

28. “Okay, Jiff. You COULD play the piano. But would anyone care? We need to raise money, not scare people away.”

29. “I could dance.”

31. COMMERCIAL BREAK

32. *The two are outside. This meeting is obviously not working out.*

33. *Jiff walks away.* Giggy randomly screams, “WHY DOESN’T SHE JUST SAY IT TO MY FACE?!”

Everyone is confused.

34. *Credits play*

All photos taken by Matt Stopera.

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