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The 13 Biggest Consequences Of Allowing Gays To Be Boy Scouts

Last week, the Boy Scouts of America announced that after completing a 2 year study, they would be upholding their ban on gays. Damn straight. Makes sense to me. Here’s why.

1. First off, kids will start posing like this.

AHHHHHHHH

2. And even worse, like this.

NOOOOOOOOOO

3. Boy Scouts will be so confused they’ll start making out with statues.

STATUES!

5. It will be mandatory for Boy Scouts to dress like MADONNA.

6. Learn the entire dance to “Vogue.”

Video available at: http://vimeo.com/24750006.

(Seriously, you NEED to watch this video if you haven’t already)

7. AND “Single Ladies.”

9. RAINBOW UMBRELLAS

IN MONKEY SUITS AT THE APPLE STORE, TOO

11. SCAAAARVES!

12. Dogs will SHIT RAINBOWS

13. And the world will explode.

THE END.

Thanks to the Born This Way blog for being my inspiration.

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Deputy Editorial Director, Devout Member of the Church of Godney
 
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