It’s almost that time again when our typically polite, courteous, and unnecessarily apologetic neighbors to the north stop being nice and start getting cocky. We are now officially within 100 days of the Sochi Winter Olympics, which means those damn Canucks are getting ready to dominate the medal stand.
During the 2010 Winter Olympics in Vancouver, the Canadians finished third in the overall medal count but took home the most golds. So let’s look past their generally agreeable nature and find — or invent — some reasons to hate them, because competition is more fun when you’re rooting for someone to fail.
1. They act like Molson invented beer. Molson sucks.
4. In America we sell beer to people in face paint first! They don’t serve them at all.
5. This is the devil’s work.
7. Sidney Crosby’s face just screams “punch me.”
10. They’re so self-centered.
11. Chad Kroger, lead singer of Nickleback.
15. They call hooded sweatshirts “bunnyhugs” in Saskatchewan.
Um, fuck that noise.
Canadians seem all friendly. But people who act THAT friendly are probably just covering up their inner perversion. Go USA.
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