What Liverpudlians Say Vs What They Mean

    "I'll come out for one." = I'll literally need to be dragged out of the Razz.

    1. "Yeah, I'm not bad, mate." – I'm really good.

    2. "Yeah, I'm not bad, mate." – Life could be a lot better.

    3. "Am off for a kip." – I'll sleep until I find something better to do.

    4. "I'm gonna give her down the banks." – I'm about to tell her what I really think.

    5. "Let's shoot off." – lt's best we leave immediately.

    6. "London prices." – An absolute rip-off.

    7. "It's likely to snow." – Merseyrail and Arriva will be on their arses for days.

    8. "I'm off on a date." – We're meeting in the Wetherspoons.

    9. "The people here are really friendly." – Just don't piss anyone off.

    10. "Are you going the game?" – Are you going to see Liverpool or Everton play?

    11. "You've got issues." – You're unbearable and I'm not sure I can be arsed with you.

    12. "Y'alright mate?" – I don't actually care to know how you are, I'm just making myself known.

    13. "Oh, you're from London?" – You're (probably) unbearable.

    14. "Y'alright for a bev?" – I'm going to the bar to get myself, and only myself, a drink.

    15. "I'm off the bevvy." – I'm not drinking again until I'm next pressured to go out.

    16. "I have the odd drink on a night out." – You'll find me shirtless, bouncing off the walls of The Krazyhouse at 3am.

    17. "Do you follow football?" – Are you a Red or a Blue?

    18. "You don't like football?" – What the fuck are you doing with your life?

    19. "I'll come out for one." – I'll literally need to be dragged out of The Razz.

    20. "It's cracking the flags out there." – It's time to walk through the centre of town without a shirt on.

    21. "They're not bad." – They're probably the best looking person I'll see tonight.

    22. "You're a wool." – I know you're not from Liverpool and therefore you shan't be accepted.

    23. "I don't mind being on me bill." – Please don't leave me to spend another night alone.

    24." I'm off into town to watch the game." – I'm planning to get absolutely hammered by 2pm, eat an SFC, and fall asleep on the train home.

    25. "It's absolutely chokka in here." – Can we just go home and watch Netflix?

    26. "That's bang out of order." – I took minor, personal offense to your opinion.

    27. "I'm not really feelin' that." – I fucking detest and refuse to go along with that.

    28. "It's like Blackpool Illuminations in here." – You're wasting my electricity and I genuinely resent you for it.

    29. "Alright if I sit there?" – Move your bag or I'll kick off.

    30. "Ya what?" – I wasn't listening to a single word you said.

    31. "I'm having a bit of 'mare." – This is quite possibly the worst day of my life.

    32. "Whenever you get a mo." – Please do it immediately.

    33. "He's a bit much." – He's the most irritating person I've met.

    34. "Where are you from?" – You're a wool, aren't you?

    35. "Fancy a bev after work?" – Let's stay in the pub until closing.

    36. "As if I'm getting into her." – I'm definitely going home with her after a few more drinks.

    37. "I can give you a sub?" – I don't want to lend you anything unless I really have to.

    38. "It's sound, lad." – I'll never forget what you did.

    39. "Honestly, I wont tell anyone." – I'm literally going to tell everyone I know.

    40. "Don't worry about it, kid." – You will regret this for the rest of your life.

    41. "Bit wet out there, mate." – It's absolutely pissing it down.

    42. "I only just twigged, there." – It took me a while to get your sophisticated sense of humour.

    43. "You're doing me head in." – Shut up.