1. You’ve never had to spend a moment of your life worrying about having a designated driver.
Your friend El is always there to haul your drunk butt home!
2. 90% of the time you don’t know if you’re at a party hosted by DePaul kids, UIC kids, or Loyola kids.
Well let’s be honest, they’re never hosted by Loyola kids.
3. If you’re ever mugged, you’d hand over your credit card, cash, and drivers license in a heartbeat.
“JUST PLEASE DON’T TAKE MY FAKE ID OR UPASS.”
If you want Greek food, you traipse down to Greektown. If you want Chinese food, you head down to Chinatown. If you want the best pizza in the country, you’ve got several options. How do state school kids get their authentic grub?
5. You’ve never been in a sorority house…
because (legally) in the city of Chicago that many girls living under one roof is considered a brothel.
6. You’ve never been to a sporting event at your school because they all suck.
Who needs collegiate sports when you have the Sox, Bulls, Bears, and Blackhawks anyway? (And I guess the Cubs).
7. Any time a friend from another school comes to visit, you immediately take them to The Bean, Navy Pier, and out for deep dish pizza.
It’s the ONLY way to do Chicago!
8. Your dorm has a strict guest sign-in procedure…
because if they didn’t random hobos would try to set up shop in your common area.
9. You go to 10x more concerts than your out-of-town friends because bands ALWAYS stop in Chicago.
And since you live so close to the concert venues you’re always first in line.
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