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1. LOL I HATE IT WHEN I LAUGH THEN SUDDENLY I FART
2. OMG DUDE WHERE'S THE FEBREZE WHEN YOU NEED IT?
3. BOOM! I JUST SET OFF THE SMOKE DETECTOR. JEALOUS?
4. WHY ARE YOU GUYS LOOKING AT ME LIKE I DID IT? I'M NOT BEING DEFENSIVE. YOU'RE THE ONES BEING DEFENSIVE
5. CAN YOU GUESS WHAT I HAD FOR LUNCH?
when your damn dog pretends he didn't just fart in front of you
6. DEFENSIVE PUPPY MANEUVER ACTIVATED
7. AHH THE GREAT OUTDOORS
8. HOLDING IT IN ONLY MAKES IT STRONGER
9. WE CAN'T BE FRIENDS ANYMORE
10. ...THEN I WALKED OUT OF THE ROOM AND EVERYONE BLAMED THE HUMAN BOY
11. HEHE IM NOT REALLY ASLEEP
12. DID YOU HEAR THAT SOUND? NO? GOOD...
13. YOU KNEW WHAT YOU WERE GETTING INTO WHEN YOU BOUGHT ME A DIFFERENT KIND OF KIBBLE
14. YOU USE AXE BODY SPRAY ALL THE TIME, YOU SHOULD BE ACCUSTOMED TO THIS
15. AND TO THINK, I WAS JUST ABOUT TO SNIFF YOUR BEHIND
16. AND YOU THOUGHT MY BREATH SMELLED PUTRID...
17. EVERYONE'S GOTTA TRY A NEW BRAND ONCE IN A WHILE
18. COVER YOUR NOSE, ITS BITE IS WORSE THAN ITS BARK
19. OOPS, AM I ON YOUR FAVORITE SWEATER?
20. OMG THAT LAST ONE WAS LONG WINDED
21. LOUDLY AND PROUDLY
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