1. “Do you speak English?”
It’s really okay to ask, but in the wrong tone ^^^this is how you come across.
No one expects you to be fluent in the host language to visit it, but learn to say, “Excuse me, do you speak English?” or “English, please” in the native tongue and lead with that. People will figure out your tourist easily enough, but they’ll also figure out you’re courteous too and be more likely to help.
2. “Seriously, why doesn’t anyone here speak English?”
Firstly, there’s a fine line between curious and obnoxious and you just crossed it.
Secondly, it makes talking about you behind your entitled self that much easier.
3. “JUST ANY QUESTION AT THIS VOLUME, IT COULD LITERALLY BE ANYTHING, WHY DO YOU ALL WORDS HAVE TO COME OUT OF YOUR MOUTH THIS LOUD?!!?”
^ Hear that? A phrase that transcends all language barriers.
4. “Where’s the Pizza Hut? Where’s the Taco Bell? Where’s the Cheesecake Factory?”
Sample the country’s cuisine. Find an independent family-owned restaurant. Support the local economy. Order from menus that aren’t numbered combo meals. You’ll survive.
5. “Well, okay then, where should we eat?”
To clarify, this isn’t a bad question; it’s encouraged. Instead here’s more of a tip on a better way to ask: “Where would you and your friends eat?” or “What’s a cafe you go to often?”
Simply rephrase it and you tend to get amazing recommendations you’d never find otherwise this way.
6. “Does anyone here know how to drive?”
Because the answer is always no. No one knows how to drive. Not here, not there, and especially not from where you’re from either.
NO ONE KNOWS HOW TO DRIVE ANYWHERE.
7. “How much is that in dollars?”
Use a converter and figure it out for yourself discreetly. Do you think our currency is the epicenter of the world and that everyone else is just your personal bank teller or something? Ohhhhh, you did think that…
8. “Why is it so cheap here? This is amazing!”
Um, it might not be so “cheap” to the people who actually live and work there.
9. “Why is everything taking so long?”
Your “slow” may just be another country’s way of life, more laid back and relaxed.
Just because a waiter abroad isn’t checking on your table and refilling your water every 9 minutes doesn’t mean they’re treating you poorly. Often they’re just not trying to hurry you through your meal and out the door. Also, whatever, reeelax, aren’t you on vacation?