7 Steps To The Coolest Party Ever

Microsoft’s launching Windows 8 on Friday. This is how it tried to launch its last major operating system: RAGING HOUSE PARTIES. Seriously.

1. Use Microsoft Paint to draw on your friends’ faces

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2. Videochat the person next to you

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3. Ask your friends to DVR shows for you

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4. Insult your friends’ ability to use their old computers

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5. Passive aggressively force your friends to help DJ your party

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6. Make your friends talk to your computer

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7. Tell them to get off your computer after inviting them over to use it

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