Ten Things Women With Vaginismus/or Vulvodynia Love To Hear

Vaginismus and Vulvodynia are two painful female sexual dysfunctions that most people know nothing about.

Vaginismus and Vulvodynia are two painful female sexual dysfunctions that inhibit women from experiencing pleasurable sexual intercourse. Many times, penetration for the woman is completely impossible due to an involuntary spasm of the pelvic floor. These are ten things we love to hear from ignorant dumb asses!

"You just got to relax."

Geez, thank you so much, I'll try that. You're so smart, what's your IQ?

"You're just really tight."

I never thought of that. What did you major in at Cornell?

"You just need lube."

Maybe you can get me horny sometime, Copernicus, so this way I can show you that I don't need lube.

"It's your first time, it's supposed to hurt."

Actually, motherfucker, it's not supposed to hurt. Sure, it's supposed to feel uncomfortable because you have this fleshy member up in your business, but it isn't supposed to feel like they're shooting the Texas Chainsaw Massacre in your pussy.

"You should just get really drunk or high to loosen you up."

Perfect. Another genius idea, da Vinci.

"Well, let's attempt a pelvic exam to see if we can do it."

This sentence is usually spoken by a nitwit gynecologist that has elementary knowledge on female sexual dysfunctions. Women with vaginismus/Vulvodynia just LOVE hearing this. Yes, come poke me with your strange instruments and your gloved hands, even though I just told you I am completely unable to receive any type of penetration. Good one, doc.

"It's just your anxiety."

Okay, thanks for listening and subsequently shrugging off my pain. That is very cute, I know never to talk to you about this again.

"Well, did you try it in different positions?"

No, of course not. I'm so glad you asked that, because now I have ideas for next time.

"Maybe you're not horny enough. You should try more foreplay."

Were you Salutatorian or Valedictorian at Cornell?

"Oh, that sucks."

I know I just listened to you talk in depth about every sexual encounter you've had, but it's cool that you don't really give a shit about mine. I'll cry about it later on tonight alone anyways, buddy!