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Living In New York City Vs. Living In Los Angeles

It’s the age-old West Cost vs. East Coast battle: sunshine, smog, and traffic vs. subways, that pee smell, and the best pizza around?

1. New York City: Traffic is the 6 train being held up at Union Square during rush hour due to a sick passenger.

Now how else am I supposed to get uptown?

Los Angeles: Traffic is every freeway and every side street from Santa Monica to the San Gabriel Valley.

Better get some audiobooks.

2. New York City: Road trips are to New Jersey, Connecticut, Long Island, and D.C.

What exit on the NJ Turnpike or Garden State Parkway? The eternal question.

Los Angeles: Road trips are VEGAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And San Francisco. But mostly VEGAS!!!!!!!!

3. New York City: The state of the beaches is…questionable.

This ain’t the Hamptons.

Los Angeles: Beach is life.

Surf’s up.

4. New York City: Everyone walks.

Los Angeles: You walk…after taking a short drive to a hiking trail.

But only Runyon Canyon if you absolutely have to.

5. New York City: Spring is that wonderful day when you can finally open your windows and go outside without a jacket.

The BEST.

Los Angeles: 68 and sunny

6. New York City: Autumn is the crunch of the leaves beneath your feet.

Check out that foliage.

Los Angeles: 68 and sunny

7. New York City: Summer is HOT, HUMID, and GROSS.

Put that A/C on Power Ranger.

8. New York City: Winter is cold, but festive.

Make sure you bring your gloves.

Los Angeles: 58 and sunny

You might need a heavier jacket. Might.

9. New York City: Rain? No big deal.

Los Angeles: Rain?!? WATER IS FALLING FROM THE SKY WHY???

10. New York City: You spend more than you’d like to admit on MetroCards.

Swipe again, please.

Los Angeles: Gas. So much money spent on gas.

11. New York City: Weed? What weed?

Los Angeles: Where *can’t* you find weed?

Paging the Green Doctor…

12. New York City: What’s that smell? Probably urine.

Occasionally, it’s maple syrup.

Los Angeles: What are you breathing? It’s probably smog.

13. New York City: You bond over your hatred of the MTA.

Los Angeles: You bond over driving directions.

14. New York City: You’re not quite sure how to say…

It’s “Kah-She-Yoo-Sko.” Supposedly.

Los Angeles: You’re not quite sure how to say…

And how you say it says a lot about you.

15. New York City: JFK and LGA are the WORST.

Los Angeles: LAX is the WORST.

16. New York City: You can’t go wrong with….

A slice of heaven.

Los Angeles: You can’t go wrong with…

That’s what a hamburger’s all about.

17. Conclusion: Whether it’s NYC or L.A…

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