What they really mean: "OH GOD, I still have so much work to do before Monday morning."
2."I hope you're all excited for the dance tonight."
What they really mean: "You better be excited because I am forced to chaperone instead of getting to watch Netflix."
3."This paper is so creative!"
What they really mean: "I've heard this same idea for the past five years."
4."This will be easy, you learned it last year."
What they really mean: "Great, I'm going to have to teach this year's material as well as last year's."
5."I'm excited to meet your families at the parent-teacher conference tonight."
What they really mean: "I have to think of nicer ways to say 'annoying' and 'loud.'"
6."Today we're going to watch an educational film."
What they really mean: "I honestly cannot handle speaking today."
7."Have a great summer!"
What they really mean: "I'm so happy I don't have to see you for three months. Sorry (not sorry) to the teacher who gets you next year."
8."I've decided to postpone the test so you have more time to prepare."
What they really mean: "I have zero time to grade tonight."
9."We're having a pop quiz today!"
What they really mean: "We'll see who was really paying attention and who was texting."
10."I'm feeling a little under the weather today."
What they really mean: "I was up all night taking care of my family, running errands, doing chores, and grading assignments. What's sleep?"
11."Your child has quite the sense of humor."
What they really mean: "Your kid is constantly interrupting my class with his 'jokes.'"
12."Your grades don't define you."
What they really mean: "You're not the brightest, but that's okay — you've got a great personality."
13."Sure, I'll come in this weekend and help reorganize classrooms."
What they really mean: "I hate everything and everyone."
14."There is no such thing as a stupid question."
What they really mean: "Yes, there really are. Don't ask them."
15."No, you may not use the restroom right now."
What they really mean: "I know you're just bored and want to screw around in the halls with your friends."
16."I'll wait until it's quiet to continue."
What they really mean: "Talk all you want, I'm not the one who will be tested on this material."
17."I'm really organized."
What they really mean: "I used to be organized... and then school started."
18."I would never choose another career over teaching."
What they really mean: "Seriously, no one would put up with crummy pay, long hours, and troublesome students if they didn't love their job. I'll always love teaching."
