What The Hell Is This Sea Monster?

And how long until it kills us all?

1. Someone in New Jersey caught this horrifying creature while fishing.

The only consolation is that it’s dead.

2. OK, what is it?

The leading theory is that it’s a really big sea lamprey, a horrifying parasitic creature that’s scary even when it’s not enormous. But some aren’t convinced: given the limited scope of the photo, it’s impossible to be sure just what that New Jerseyan speared.

3. No, but seriously, what is it?

  1. Put on your cryptozoologist hat and pick from the following.

    1. A sea lamprey. The most obvious explanation is usually the right one.
    2. A really ugly eel. With a face only a mama eel could love.
    3. A raccoon. Isn’t that what they said the Montauk Monster was?
    1. A movie prop. Very realistic!
    2. A hoax. Good effort, though.
    3. An actual monster. Come on, have you seen that thing?

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