Ranking The New “Arrested Development” Characters

The Bluths made some new friends this season: how do the interlopers stack up? posted on

10. China Garden (Karen Maruyama)

Netflix

What is the joke here — that she’s loud? Aside from the fun name (see also: Olive Garden), China Garden is one-note. Not to mention the fact that the character’s kind of racist.

9. Perfecto Telles (Eli Vargas)

Netflix

Aside from the mystery over whether or not he’s an undercover cop — and the statutory rape question — there’s not much to Perfecto. His name does allow for some predictable confusion, though.

8. Herbert Love (Terry Crews)

Netflix

While Herbert Love has potential (he’s a birther who loves hookers!), he never really comes into his own. I guess that’s what happens when you’re conceived as a weirdly late Herman Cain parody.

7. P-Hound (Richard Jin Namkung)

Netflix

George Michael’s roommate isn’t the most dynamic character, but there’s something likable about him. He plays off Michael Cera well, which makes their scenes some of the strongest.

6. Rebel Alley (Isla Fisher)

Netflix

Rebel Alley is definitely charming: it’s clear why the Bluths would fall for her. The character won me over when she wrote “DOVE (BAR)” on that paper bag, but Fisher needs to work on her American accent.

5. Marky Bark (Chris Diamantopoulos)

Netflix

The hair, the name, the pet ostrich — Marky Bark brings an ample amount of weirdness to an already quirky series. He might not remember faces, but his face blindness is something I’ll never forget.

4. Heartfire (Mary Lynn Rajskub)

Netflix

Without uttering a single word, Heartfire leaves a lasting impression. A lot of it has to do with Rajskub’s facial expressions, but it’s also in the writing. Heartfire trying to order at the bar is one of the season’s best gags.

3. Argyle Austero (Tommy Tune)

Netflix

The argyle on Argyle is cute, but I didn’t fall in love with the character until he started tap dancing under the table. There’s so much musical theater exuberance waiting to burst forth from this delightful weirdo.

2. Dr. Norman (John Slattery)

Netflix

You had me at “disgraced anesthesiologist.” Obviously John Slattery can do no wrong, and this character must have been written for him — it’s a perfect fit. He’s so odd and sleazy and somehow endearing.

1. DeBrie Bardeaux (Maria Bamford)

Netflix

Nobody does it better than Maria Bamford, one of comedy’s strangest and most manic voices. DeBrie is such an absurd and pitiful character, she’s almost hard to watch. But you also never want her to leave.

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