Baz Luhrmann Sucks

Sorry, Moulin Rouge fans, it’s time to face the music. Before The Great Gatsby hits theaters, let’s take a look at the director’s past missteps.

1. If you’ve seen one Baz Luhrmann movie, you’ve seen them all.

ID: 1152053

2. They’re all so heavy-handed. Dramatic lightning? For real?

ID: 1151917

3. Banal platitudes? No, thanks.

ID: 1151867

4. SLOW DOWN with those zooms.

ID: 1151931

5. And everything is LOUD. It’s enough to give you a headache.

ID: 1151853

6. LOUD costumes. LOUD actors. LOUD sets.

ID: 1152001

7. Don’t even get me started on the product placement.

ID: 1151875

8. Remember when Baz was like, “Oh, I know what Shakespeare’s classic love story needs: Jamie Kennedy with pink hair”?

ID: 1151913

9. “And I’ll make these ’90s teen stars use Shakespearean language. That won’t be awkward at all.”

ID: 1151939

10. Sorry, but it IS awkward. Like Leo’s face here.

ID: 1151964

11. It’s like, “I don’t know, Baz. Do YOU believe in directorial restraint?”

ID: 1151990

12. Prostitute with a heart of gold? Seen it!

ID: 1152012

14. I mean, honestly.

ID: 1152038

15. Is any of this crap even remotely necessary?

ID: 1152040


ID: 1152080

17. More platitudes. And people quote this garbage incessantly.

ID: 1152075

18. Her dying day is in like a minute. So emotionally manipulative. I can’t.

ID: 1152109

19. You want to talk about Australia? OK, let’s talk about Australia.

ID: 1152125

20. Like all his movies, it’s style over substance. But it’s not even good style.

ID: 1152135

21. It’s kind of shocking that a movie with this kind of hotness could be SO GODDAMN BORING.

ID: 1152153

22. At least in his other bad romances, the leads had chemistry. There is NONE here.

ID: 1152174

23. Child actors: just say no.

ID: 1152180

24. I get it. Some of you enjoy being visually assaulted.

ID: 1152198

25. Some of you prefer color to story.

ID: 1152203

26. But these movies are silly, overblown, and occasionally unwatchable.

ID: 1152208

27. And THIS IS THE GUY adapting The Great Gatsby to film?

ID: 1152215

28. Perhaps he’ll finally explore subtlety.

ID: 1152233

29. Oh, it’s in 3D? Cool. I give up.

ID: 1152237

30. Yes, opulence is part of the story. But only PART.

ID: 1152247

31. It shouldn’t be an endless distraction.

ID: 1152252

32. But then, what else do you expect from Baz Luhrmann?

ID: 1152272

33. This is a director who never learned that sometimes less is more.

ID: 1152280

Check out more articles on BuzzFeed.com!

  Your Reaction?


    Now Buzzing