Nice to meet you = I see your pic on Tinder
Where you been? = Swipe to the right
I could show you incredible things = I could show you some OK things
Magic, madness, heaven, sin = My apartment, OCD, Nutella, gin
Saw you there and I thought, Oh my god = I saw your pic and I thought, Nice-looking beard
Look at that face, you look like my next mistake = Look at that face, you look like my next bae
Love's a game, wanna play = Tinder's a game, no one likes to play
New money, suit and tie = No money, T-shirt, open fly
I can read you like a magazine = I can watch you like a Netflix show scene
Ain't it funny rumors fly = Ain't it funny how your profile pic was a lie
And I know you heard about me = And I know you saw that Instagram
So hey, let's be friends = So hey, let's be hookup pals
I'm dying to see how this one ends = I'm dying to see if this one lasts
Grab your passport and my hand = Grab your ID for the bars
I could make the bad guys good for a weekend = I could get confused and think you're a good guy for six months
So it's gonna be forever = So it's gonna be about eight months
Or it's gonna go down in flames = Or we go back online
You can tell me when it's over = You ghost me when it's over
If the high was worth the pain = This was a waste of time
Got a long list of ex-lovers = My number's getting high
They'll tell you I'm insane = They'll tell you I'm a pain
'Cause you know I love the players = 'Cause you know I love hard-to-read guys
And you love the game = And you love being lame
'Cause we're young and we're reckless = 'Cause we're getting old and should settle down
We'll take this way too far = We'll overthink this all
It'll leave you breathless = I'll leave you blue-balled
Or with a nasty scar = Or with some benign HPV
Got a long list of ex-lovers = My numbers getting too high
They'll tell you I'm insane= They'll tell you I'm ACTUALLY insane
But I got a blank space, baby = But I got an unfriend button
And I'll write your name = And I'll delete your name
