7 Things You Never Knew About Pigeons

Pigeons are everywhere, but we know surprisingly little about them. Suspicious? We certainly think so.

1. Pigeons mate for life.

Andrew Kuznetsov / Via Flickr: -cavin-

Once pigeons fall in love they're bonded forever, which shows high levels of emotional intelligence. As the famous saying goes - "if you're a bird, I'm a bird". This can be confusing for pigeons, as they already know that they're birds.

2. Pigeons are smart.

G OZCAN / Via Flickr: gulsenozcan

Pigeons can pass the mirror test, which means that they recognise their reflections. If they know about mirrors, what else do they know? Do they watch us while we shower? Do they know where the nuclear codes are? All signs point to yes.

3. Pigeons have excellent hearing.

Nahemoth / Via Flickr: nahemoth

They can hear distant storms approaching and volcanoes erupting. They also heard you last night at 2am when you rolled over in bed and whispered "I'm so alone" into the darkness, and they're definitely going to tell their friends about it.

4. Pigeons can't get bird flu.

Pedro Ribeiro Simões / Via Flickr: pedrosimoes7

When scientists tried to infect pigeons with bird flu, giving them 100 – 1000 times the concentration a bird would encounter in the wild, the pigeons just shrugged.

5. Killing or injuring a pigeon is a crime.

OliBac / Via Flickr: olibac

You can be fined up to £5000 and go to prison for up to six months for causing damage to a pigeon or its nest. That's right - the UK government is basically the bird mafia, and pigeons will send the heavies after you. Pigeons always have the last, tiny laugh.

6. Pigeons don't have separate pee and poop.

Michael Coghlan / Via Flickr: mikecogh

They don't waste time with separate bodily functions. You'll never find a pigeon sitting on the toilet for 20 minutes sending questionable Snapchats. The real question is - what have they been DOING with all the time they've been saving?

7. Based on all of the above evidence, pigeons will rule the earth by 2018.

Ana Sofia Guerreirinho / Via Flickr: pip0ka

Forget the General Election and start preparing gifts and poems of adoration for our new feathered overlords. Pigeons are smart, indestructible and protected by law. The future of this planet is ripe to be pee-pooped on - and it's time we made our peace with that.