The 15 Things You Need To Know About Zeke The Plumber

There is a 98 percent chance he left you psychologically damaged when you originally saw him in 1992.

1. Zeke the Plumber appeared in the second episode of “Salute Your Shorts.”

2. We don’t know when he was alive but we do know: “A long time ago there was a guy named Zeke.”

(dramatization of a long time ago)

3. While in the army, he was stationed in the Philippines. A parrot bit off his nose. This is why he has no nose.

But why it continues to bleed…a detail left unanswered.

4. There are 13 species of parrot that occur in the Philippines. It could have been any one of them.

Zeke’s assailant could still be out there. The Philippines has no official judicial process for prosecuting crime-committing animals.

5. The backstory: he died in an explosion.


So, sometime after his time in the army, Zeke lands a job cleaning toilets at Camp Anawana. He is especially well-equipped to do this job because he has no nose, and therefore cannot smell the horrid excrement of adolescent girls and boys.

One day while digging a hole (reason for which is unclear), Zeke hits a pipe. It is a gas pipe and because he cannot smell the gas, he makes a “big mistake” of lighting a match.

The question remains: Why did Zeke light the match? We’ll never know.

6. After the explosion, all that remained of Zeke was a piece of his upper lip and his plunger.

The plunger is now cursed and Zeke haunts anyone who touches it.

7. As a ghost, Zeke has some disturbing powers.

Like making a toilet appear in the middle of the bunk. Or it was there to begin with, which is even scarier.

8. The first person Zeke haunts is Michael, who asks who he is and then asks if he’s Zeke the Plumber. Zeke replies: “My friends call me Zeke.”

9. Yay! Zeke has friends!

10. Zeke is something of a gossip, so don’t tell him anything you don’t want broadcast to all of Camp Anawana.

Specifically, do not tell him that you still sleep with your stuffed elephant and that you suck your thumb. You stupid baby.

11. Well, except he can get inside your head by plunging it with his haunted plunger. Sooooo, you’re screwed either way.

12. Zeke also has some hearing and comprehension issues.

The second person Zeke haunts is Telly. He says he will grant her a wish and when Telly says she wants to be a professional ball player, Zeke takes her to a ball and traps her there. And calls her a “sissy girl.” That’s not very nice.

13. Zeke is not Dennis Farina (aka Nick Miller’s dad on “New Girl”). Dennis would very much appreciate it if you stopped asking him this.

14. Zeke is short for Ezekiel.

And the meaning of this name, according to behindthename.com:

From the Hebrew name יְחֶזְקֵאל (Yechezqel) meaning “God strengthens”. Ezekiel is a major prophet of the Old Testament, the author of the Book of Ezekiel. He lived in Jerusalem until the Babylonian conquest and captivity of Israel, at which time he was taken to Babylon. The Book of Ezekiel describes his vivid symbolic visions that predict the restoration of the kingdom of Israel. As an English given name, Ezekiel has been used since the Protestant Reformation.

15. Zeke today.

Zeke the Plumber continues to terrify young minds, albeit from afar: online. He has well over 1,000 Facebook friends (he wasn’t lying!), and continues to publicly humiliate Michael Stein.

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