1. You'll come to the conclusion that pizza is a healthy snack. It has protein, carbs, and dairy. Is that basil I spy? Vegetables too, then.
2. You count any type of movement as cardio.
3. You interpret food portion sizes as you like. And your way is the right way.
4. Same goes for alcohol.
5. This is a gluten-free snack. It is also low carb. Therefore, you may have 20.
6. If someone tells you cake is an OK reward, then they are probably very wise.
7. Fitness is what you make of it. Just saying the word "fitness" is exercise.
8. Cupcakes are just healthy muffins in sugar hats.
9. Running is not a strictly vertical sport. Why Reebok has not come out with running couches is beyond you.
10. You also jog. This is a viable form of jogging.
11. A cleanse can always include wine. Wine is made from fruit and is therefore just juice that makes you feel better.
12. Similarly, many other alcohols are permitted during a cleanse. They're all liquids, right?
13. When you're trying to eat healthy — the nutrition still counts if it goes in your mouth.
14. It's not your fault you're not seeing results. Three-hour diets should be a thing.
15. You'll only hear what you want to hear.
16. You do eat a variety of colors. The green ones are kale.
17. This is truth.
