Proof That Writing Cover Letters Is The Worst

To whom it may concern: can’t we just skip this step and go straight to the hiring part?

1. So, you’re unemployed. Welcome to the club.

2. Applying to jobs has basically become a job.

3. You hit the online job boards, and ALAS, something you’re actually qualified for pops up!

4. You read through the qualifications: resumé - CHECK, work samples - CHECK, cover letter… oh, here we go again.

5. You briefly consider using that pre-written resumé you keep around. Just copy and pasting the company’s name in is SO much easier than starting from scratch.

6. Ah, damn it. You better just write a new one. Make a real go of it. Here goes nothing.

7. Maybe you should do some research on writing a good cover letter first. That’ll be good.

8. Wait - you have to compliment the company, tout your skills, not regurgitate your resumé, highlight what you can bring to the company and sound interesting - all in under 300 words? WHAT?

9. You accept that this is going to take a while.

You said it, Amy.

10. Oh, don’t forget to do some extra research on the company. Always helps to sound informed.

11. You’re losing steam. After 10 versions of your three-paragraph letter you start questioning the whole process. Do you really even want to work there? Is it worth all this effort?

12. How are you supposed to list your skills without tooting your own horn? It’s not possible.

13. You send your 15th, and hopefully final, version to a friend to read. They’ll tell you how wonderful it is, for sure.

14. Wait, what do they think you should change? The entire formatting? Ugh, more edits.

15. You implement those last corrections. It’s finally done. Off it goes, guiding you straight to employment. You’re pretty pleased with yourself.

16. Better check that email one more time, just to really make sure it sent…

17. Wait… what… You misspelled the company name. HOW DID YOU MISS THAT!? NOOOOOOOOOOO. Guess you’re not getting this job.

18. Better head back to the drawing board. Oh - this job opening looks cool. “Please send cover letter.”

19. Here we go again.

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