Proof That Writing Cover Letters Is The Worst

To whom it may concern: can’t we just skip this step and go straight to the hiring part?

1. So, you’re unemployed. Welcome to the club.

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2. Applying to jobs has basically become a job.

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3. You hit the online job boards, and ALAS, something you’re actually qualified for pops up!

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4. You read through the qualifications: resumé - CHECK, work samples - CHECK, cover letter… oh, here we go again.

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5. You briefly consider using that pre-written resumé you keep around. Just copy and pasting the company’s name in is SO much easier than starting from scratch.

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6. Ah, damn it. You better just write a new one. Make a real go of it. Here goes nothing.

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7. Maybe you should do some research on writing a good cover letter first. That’ll be good.

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8. Wait - you have to compliment the company, tout your skills, not regurgitate your resumé, highlight what you can bring to the company and sound interesting - all in under 300 words? WHAT?

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9. You accept that this is going to take a while.

You said it, Amy.

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10. Oh, don’t forget to do some extra research on the company. Always helps to sound informed.

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11. You’re losing steam. After 10 versions of your three-paragraph letter you start questioning the whole process. Do you really even want to work there? Is it worth all this effort?

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12. How are you supposed to list your skills without tooting your own horn? It’s not possible.

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13. You send your 15th, and hopefully final, version to a friend to read. They’ll tell you how wonderful it is, for sure.

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14. Wait, what do they think you should change? The entire formatting? Ugh, more edits.

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15. You implement those last corrections. It’s finally done. Off it goes, guiding you straight to employment. You’re pretty pleased with yourself.

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16. Better check that email one more time, just to really make sure it sent…

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17. Wait… what… You misspelled the company name. HOW DID YOU MISS THAT!? NOOOOOOOOOOO. Guess you’re not getting this job.

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18. Better head back to the drawing board. Oh - this job opening looks cool. “Please send cover letter.”

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19. Here we go again.

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