The “SWUG” movement officially started at Yale a few years ago, but senior ladies at universities everywhere have been SWUGs long before the official title was declared.
1. Refused to dress to theme.
They might as well called it “Corporate Bros and Office No’s” because there is no way you were going to put on skimpy business-wear to see the same people you have been around for the past four years. And yes, you wore all black to a highlighter party.
2. BYOW’d a fraternity party.
BYOW = Bring Your Own Wine because warm keg beer is okay, but do you know what is better? Wine.
3. Realized that some of the freshman got their driver’s license last year.
And had conflicted feelings about being attracted to them.
4. Made best friends with your couch.
Remember when Thursdays were thirsty? It’s just so much easier to quench your thirst with a bottle of wine and the second season of “30 Rock” that you haven’t seen since last semester.
5. Forgot that freshman girls wear heels out.
It may have taken three years to appreciate flat shoes but bar floors are slippery and walking in heels is a lot of effort.
6. Pretended to be a smoker so you would have an excuse to leave the bar.
There are just a lot of underclassmen in there and it’s weird to stand outside alone if you’re not doing anything and it’s just one cigarette and why did you even come to the bar to begin with?
7. Wore the same sweats to class two days in a row.
Senior classes are really hard. Why make them more hard by looking good? You need room in your clothing to grow your knowledge. That’s how it works when you’re a SWUG.
8. Became out of touch with campus gossip.
You have enough on your mind with your thesis, your future, your wine and what Jess is doing on “New Girl,” so being in touch with who made-out with whom is a lot to handle on top of all this.
And when you got separated for a few minutes, this happened.
10. Re-watched the entirety of “The Hills.”
Watching beautiful people party is enough of a social life for you. When did LC become so relatable? It’s like she knows your soul.
11. Brought pizza to the bar.
Bar pizza is not nearly as good as pizzeria pizza. SWUGs don’t compromise quality for dignity.
12. Went to Taco Bell with your best friend and called it a “date night.”
Senior boys have freshman girls and senior girls have each other. And fast food. And wine. And homework.
13. Spent more time talking to the owner of your favorite bar than mingling with your peers.
Bar owners are great. They are so wise and have great advice about where to get your car fixed locally and it can be fun to watch freshman get denied at the door.
14. Pregamed happy hour in your Friday lecture with a water bottle of wine.
Now that you are twenty-one there is nothing stopping you from enjoying some godly nectar in your class that goes until 4 pm (except possibly open container laws and university policy).
15. You weren’t offended that someone accused you of being a super-senior.
That just means that you’re doing SWUG right. You give off the vibe of a veteran SWUG.
16. Never asked for a wifi password.
Your phone has memorized the password for all bars, fraternity houses and popular apartments on, near and around campus.
17. Refused to learn the names of any freshman.
You even go out of your way to not learn their names.
18. Cried a little over a picture of you when you were a freshman.
You still had your high school body. You were tan because the summer before was spent outside enjoying your youth and not in an office building your resume. You wore jeans to class more than once a week.
19. Stopped crying about it because you realized you are a better person now and when you were a freshman, you were scared of seniors like you.
When you were a freshman, you knew nothing about your school. You had no idea how to work the system. Now, you know everything you need to work the system, both socially and academically. Remember being a freshman and wondering how all the seniors were so self-assured? LOL.
20. Lived out this video and loved every second of it.
21. Left a party to take a nap and returned an hour later.
Being a college senior is similar to being a senior citizen in that naps are necessary and falling is inevitable.
22. Came to the conclusion that you may have been SWUG for a few years, despite only having been a senior for a few months.
It takes time to get into a SWUG mindset. You may not have been close to this level of SWUG when you were a sophomore but you were probably on your way.