12 Hard Realities Facing Your Childhood

Because it's necessary that you hear this.

1. Hungry, Hungry Hippos Required No Talent

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As good as you might have been, these skills don't transfer into the real world.

2. Legos Cause Serious Injury

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Even though it always seemed like a good idea at first.

3. With all the Monopoly money in the world, you were still poor.

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Even on those rare occasions when you actually finished the game.

4. Simba’s dad is never coming back

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It's still too soon.

5. Blowing on cartridges was more of a formality than a practical solution

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Always hoping that maybe just one time, it will work.

6. Magic 8 ball answers were dictated more by chance than by magic

Am I going to fail my finals?

7. Your hand does not look like the torso of a turkey

Your mother and teachers lied, lied right there to your face.

8. Nerf guns are cool if you like shooting the ground four feet in front of your friends

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But then again, perfect for close range.

9. Waldo is really easy to find

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...because you took too long.

10. You don't just grow progressively taller forever. You die.

11. The answer "next year" always means never.

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ESPECIALLY in relation to puppies.

12. Sledding is not fun unless you fall enough times to only remember the laughs from not dying.

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*Nervous laughs

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Where some of your childhood dreams really do come true.