1. The Verbal Gymnast.
Confuse them with you magnificent non sequiturs until they admit they’re pregnant.
2. The Rocket Scientist.
Hit ‘em with those advanced maths until they realize you’re describing a SECOND HUMAN THAT’S GROWING INSIDE OF THEM.
3. The Assembly Interruptus.
Dramatic. Direct. Forced into honesty by the judgement of the crowd before them.
4. The Beginning of the End (of Humanity).
Gently, tenderly, and with pity is the way to go with this one.
Because they already know that there’s no containing the blast zone.
5. The Sneak Attack Hug of Joy.
The most fun of all the options because you get to lift a human being in the air. But apparently that’s bad for pregnant ladies, so don’t.
6. The Silent Gasp.
Because you’re a crack FBI agent and you’ve solved the case without even needing to ask a single question.
- U.S. presidential candidates are making their final pitches before the New Hampshire Primary, the second voting contest of the nominating season 🇺🇸
- The Pentagon has confirmed that North Korea successfully launched a satellite into orbit on Sunday night.
- President Obama asked Congress for $1.8 billion to fight the spread of the Zika virus across the Americas.