1. On breaking up...
Your old flame can't move on and writes you beautiful love letters every day for a year:
Your ex texts you once in a blue moon when they're horny:
2. On your first date...
Your date plans an intensely elaborate night that fulfills your bucket list:
You're lucky if your date puts on real pants before hanging out with you:
3. On having a meet-cute...
You almost get hit by a moving vehicle but the person of your dreams saves you:
You actually get hit and you don't meet anyone:
4. On rebounds...
Your rebound ends up being the person you were meant to be with all along:
You wake up and regret everything:
5. On dating your friends...
You start hooking up with your friend and realize you were meant to be together:
You drunkenly hook up once and promise to never speak of it again:
6. On recovering from a breakup...
You manage to stay flawless and classy through the entire breakup:
You completely lose your shit:
7. On stopping the one you love from being with someone else:
You stop their wedding just in the knick of time:
You watch their love develop on Facebook and silently die inside but never say anything:
8. On having bad luck in love..
Your bad luck is super endearing which makes someone fall in love with you:
Your bad luck is just... bad luck.
But, that's OK. Because real life is way more interesting than the movies, anyway.
