How Boston Are You?

From the Back Bay to the Dunkin’s in J.P.

  1. Check all that you have done:
    1. Watched a Red Sox game
    2. Stay up past midnight to watch a Red Sox game
    3. Cried during a Red Sox game
    4. Broken something like a vase or your phone during a Red Sox game
    5. Screamed at a loved one during a Red Sox game
    6. Had sex while a Red Sox game was on the TV in the same room
    7. Been to Fenway Park
    8. Gotten drunk in Fenway Park
    9. Made out in Fenway Park
    10. Had sex in Fenway Park
    11. Thought about the Red Sox during sex
    12. Took a day off to go to a Sox game, your boss understood
    13. Climbed on the brass ducks in the Boston Common as a kid
    14. Shopped at Newbury Comics
    15. Shopped at the Garment District
    16. Shopped at Jordan’s Furniture
    17. Went to Jordan’s Furniture to ride MOM or see an IMAX movie
    18. Went to the IMAX at Jordan’s Furniture on a date
    19. Been to Cape Cod
    20. Referred to going to Cape Cod as “going down the Cape”
    21. Been to Martha’s Vineyard
    22. Made fun of people who say “the Cape” or “the Vineyard”
    23. Gotten lost at the Natick Mall (now the “COLLECTION”)
    24. Stolen an older sibling’s ID/ had a younger sibling steal your ID so you/they could go to a show
    25. Had a fake taken away by a wicked tough bouncer
    26. Had to explain the difference between the South End and Southie.
    27. Been called out by your not-Boston friends for saying “wicked” constantly
    28. Gotten unnecessarily annoyed by people asking about parking a car in Harvard Yard.
    29. Actually pronounced it “pahk ya cah” so you really can’t complain
    30. Referred to Dunkin Donuts as “Dunky’s”, “Dunkin’s” or any other nickname
    31. Been to a party where there were Munchkins
    32. Brought a box of Munchkins to a party
    33. Brought a box of Munchkins to work
    34. Brought a box of Munchkins to a wedding, funeral, or baby shower
    35. Used inappropriate words to describe Tom Brady’s hair
    36. Thought inappropriate thoughts about Tom Brady
    37. Thought inappropriate thoughts about Tom Brady’s wife
    38. Honked at someone on the Southeast Expressway
    39. Honked at someone on Storrow Drive
    40. Honked at someone in the Callahan Tunnel
    41. Sped up at a yellow light
    42. Honked at the car in front of you for stopping at a yellow light
    43. Went to Plimoth Plantation for a field trip as a child
    44. Went to Olde Sturbridge Village for a field trip as a child
    45. Taken a walk at Arnold Arboretum
    46. Gotten stoned or drunk at Arnold Arboretum
    47. Taken a Duck Tour
    48. Been almost run over by a Duck Tour and given them the finger
    49. Ridden the swan boats
    50. Ridden the swan boats drunk or stoned
    51. Walked the Freedom Trail
    52. Always meant to walk the Freedom Trail but never actually did it
    53. Chanted “Yankees Suck” at an event other than a baseball game
    54. Refused to date someone because they were a Yankees fan
    55. Seen “The Departed”
    56. Seen “The Town”
    57. Seen “Good Will Hunting”
    58. Complained about they got the accents wrong in any of those movies
    59. Eaten pizza at Santarpio’s
    60. Eaten clam chowder at Union Oyster House
    61. Had ice cream at J.P. Licks
    62. Had ice cream in the undersea room at Herrell’s in Harvard Square (before it closed)
    63. Had ice cream from the giant milk bottle outside the Children’s Museum
    64. Called a liquor store a “packie”
    65. Called a water fountain a “bubbler”
    66. Called the public transportation system of another city “The T” reflexively
    67. Called sprinkes “jimmies”
    68. Called a sandwich on a long roll a “sub”
    69. Eaten a sub from D’Angelo’s
    70. Smelled like D’Angelo’s for the rest of the day
    71. Worn cargo shorts
    72. Worn cargo shorts and a polo shirt
    73. Worn a “nice” pair of cargo shorts to a fancy event
    74. Described the weather by what type of fleece was required
    75. Understood that a “spa” is a deli, not a place to get a massage
    76. Had a friend you only called by his or her last name
    77. Had a friend that you only called by his or her last name, which happened to be Sully
    78. Been a college student in Boston or Cambridge
    79. Been annoyed by the college students in Boston and Cambridge
    80. Enjoyed that one week at the end of May when all the students are gone, before the summer ones come in
    81. Listened to WFNX and WBCN (RIP)
    82. Listened to Bathazar and Pebbles in the morning
    83. Known someone who has a cousin who knows Ben Affleck or Matt Damon
    84. Informed someone that some celebrity is actually from the Boston area
    85. Run into the one-armed push up man in the Fens
    86. Known better than to ever walk through the Fens at night
    87. Participated in Allston Christmas
    88. Drunkely walked all the way across the city after the T closed
    89. Drunkenly walked all the way across the city in the snow wearing heels
    90. Played on the musical stairs at the Science Museum
    91. Been to a concert at the Hatch Shell
    92. Been to a concert at the Middle East
    93. Used “wicked” as a modifying adverb ironically
    94. Used “wicked” as a modifying adverb seriously
    95. Been drunk on the T
    96. Made out on the T
    97. Made your Facebook profile a selfie of you at Fenway
    98. Spray painted something on one of the bridges over the Charles
    99. Bought pot in the Pit in Harvard Square
    100. Believed without a doubt Boston is the greatest city

Correction: A previous version of this post spelled Plimoth Plantation the way the town is spelled now, not the old-timey way. We apologize to all pilgrims for the error.

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