1. Girl Scouts
I only agreed to wear that stupid sash because of snack time.
It’s not like anyone goes for the rides. That fried dough though…
4. Super Bowl Parties
You keep an eye on the game, I’ll keep an eye on the Buffalo chicken wing dip.
5. High School Clubs
There’ll be pizza at your first meeting? Sure I’ll come (and not come to any more meetings for the rest of the year)!
Let’s be honest, those orange slices during half-time were my only motivation.
7. Donating Blood
I was promised cookies at the end of this thing.
8. Baseball games
Yay sports! Get me some more Cracker Jacks, would ya?
9. Breakfast with Santa
Can we just skip the jolly bearded guy and get right to the pancakes?
11. Family gatherings
I can deal with the awkward small talk in exchange for lots of mashed potatoes.
12. Doctor’s appointments
If I’m getting this shot, there better be a lollipop waiting for me at the end.
14. Movie theater
It may be expensive, but nothing compares to that theater popcorn.