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    12 Celebrity New Year's Resolutions For 2014

    (Or at least they should be.)

    1. Lorde - see a diamond in the flesh

    2. Zac Efron - continue to dominate Common White Girl tweets

    3. Brian Griffin - never bury a bone in the ground again

    4. Paula Deen - have a cooking show on BET

    5. Beyoncé - join forces with Pope Francis & rule the world together

    6. North West - learn to walk without holding Kim's hand

    7. Kanye West - learn to ride a motorcycle without holding Kim's boob

    8. Ylvis - get the courage to talk to some foxes

    9. Barack Obama - prove to Michelle (& the country) that he can still perform

    10. Carrie Underwood - enroll in some acting classes

    11. Miley Cyrus - create sledgehammer-flavored lollypops

    12. Dylan Sprouse - stop taking pictures of himself Zack-ing off