28 Times Amanda Seyfried's Hair Was Your Religion

Forget Gretchen Weiners — I need to know what secrets Karen Smith's hair is hiding. Amanda's locks just turned 28 yesterday.

1. When It Gave Veronica Lake A Run For Her Money

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At the SAG Awards this year.

2. When It Was Parted Down The Center Oh-So Casually.

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At the Berlinale Internation Film Festival.

3. When It Probably Just Braided Itself Because It's That Magical

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Messy perfection.

4. That Time It Was Just Taunting Us With Its Shiny Glory

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Actual question: IS SHE A WITCH?

5. When It Officially Usurped Kate Moss's Hair As Queen of The Center Part

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Nothing tastes as good as awesome hair feels.

6. When It Morphed In To A Red Bob With Bangs and it WORKED

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I know it's almost definitely a wig, but in In Time her hair made me believe.

7. When It Was Crimped And It Didn't Even Look Like She Came From A Middle School Sleepover

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Hello, holiday party beauty inspo.

8. When It Worked. That. Updo.

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Skinny headband, texture, and volume. Check, check, and check.

9. That Time It Defied Logic And Physics And Was Super Long and Straight

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Just...how?

10. When It Was All Tousled And No Effs Were Given That Day

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Even that cute photog gives her hair a thumbs up. Look at him. But mostly look at her hair.

11. When It Was Shorter And Kate Middleton-y

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BRB--taking this photo to my hairdresser's.

12. That Time It Served Up Valley Of The Dolls-Level Realness

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Thank you ELLE Magazine for giving us this.

13. When It Got All FLOTUS-y On The Cover of W

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I'd vote for them.

("Them" being every single strand of her hair.)

14. BRAIDED TOPKNOT #1

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(Also take note of her metallic blue cat eye. Girl's beauty game is on. point.)

15. BRAIDED TOP KNOT #2

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It's like a futuristic alien made a beautiful baby made of hair with a German milkmaid.

16. When It Made You Forget She Was Wearing This Hat

Well, almost forget about it.

17. That Time It Rocked Whatever This Is

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A low pony-meets-bun-meets-faux-bob? Whatever it is I LOVE IT.

18. When It Made '70s Porn Perms Look Goooood

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When she played Linda Lovelace in 2013's Lovelace, of course.

19. When It Went All Heidi On Us

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Braided crowns = my favorite thing in this world.

20. When It Fooled Us With A Faux Bob

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It might be a crime if she ever cut off her lovely hair, but damn if it doesn't work at this length, too.

21. When It Worked The Wind Machine And She Looked Like Some Sort Of Lion-Goddess

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In Italian Vogue, because where else would this photo shoot happen?

22. When...I'm Sorry What Was I Saying?

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Va-va-VOOM, Ms. Seyfried!

23. When It Was The Stuff of Pinterest Wedding Board Dreams

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On the 2009 Golden Globes red carpet.

24. That Time It Made Us All Want To Go Grunge

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Oh, I can look grungey AND have clean, fabulous hair? Amazing.

25. When It Got All Punked Up

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At this year's Met Gala Seyfried faux'd a 'hawk with this cool, sleek style.

26. That Time It Upped The Entire Ponytail Genre

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Center parted with a little teased volume? Unexpected genius.

27. When It Looked Sexy Pushed Back

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OK, technically it's pulled back but how could I pass up that Mean Girls reference?

28. And That Time It Made It Through High School With Nary a Flaw

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Ugh.