The DOs And DON’Ts Of Being An NFL Fan

Your ultimate guide to having epic Sundays this fall.

1. DO bring the creepiest doll you can find to intimidate your opponents.

Image by Rick Wilking / Reuters

2. DON’T spend hours crafting a hat shaped like a ring your team will never win.

Image by Rebecca Cook / Reuters

3. DO go parking lot scooter skiing.

Image by Al Bello / Getty Images

4. DON’T shave a bridge into your head.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

5. DO get an awesome nickname.

Image by Joe Robbins / Getty Images

6. DON’T have that nickname be “Hipster Streaker.”

Taking off your clothes is so mainstream.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

7. DO party so hard that the handcuffs come out to play.

Image by Ben Margot / AP

8. DON’T use those handcuffs as weapons.

Image by Ben Margot / AP

9. DO wear two killer Bronco statues on your shoulders.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

10. DON’T wear gaudy number-glasses to a ceremony honoring a recently deceased athlete.

Image by Mike Blake / Reuters

11. DO bedazzle your foam finger.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

12. DON’T bedazzle your face, shirt, and fake ram horns.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

13. DO wear a fake mustache to honor Jeff Fisher if you’re an adorable girl.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

14. DO wear a fake mustache to honor Jeff Fisher if you’re an adorable girl. (So important, it had to be said twice.)

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

15. DON’T wear a fake mustache if you have a bedazzled face, shirt, and fake ram horns.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

16. DO reimagine Elvis as a character in the Green Lantern universe.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

17. DON’T take investment advice from this guy.

FINAL SCORE: Seattle 27 - Dallas 7

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

18. DO take a break from your job in the Blue Man Group to watch your team play.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

19. DON’T take a break from your job on the Death Star to watch your team play.

Vader doesn’t play that shit.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

20. DO look identical to Kevin from The Office.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

21. DON’T look identical to a hipster douchenozzle.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

22. DO be surprised and hurt when your team loses a heartbreaker.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

23. DON’T be surprised and hurt when your wife leaves you upon seeing what you wore to the game.

Image by REUTERS PICTURES / Reuters

24. DO wear a disguise if you’re a Jaguars fan.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP

25. DON’T do meth.

Image by REUTERS PITCTURES / Reuters

26. NOT EVEN ONCE.

Image by ASSOCIATED PRESS / AP