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1. "If I turn my head this way, will I finally make it clear how much you bore me?"
2. "I just CAN'T believe how merciful is natural selection with you."
3. "Reading the latest about my lame haters."
4. "Wanna know the secret to look this good? You need to apply for security clearance first."
5. "Please, explain the joke for the 30th bloody time. I'm sure this time I'm going to find it remotely funny."
6. "Your mediocrity gives me headaches."
7. "THAT dress with THOSE shoes?"
8. "I'll give you the silent treatment until you admit diamond pattern is NEVER an option."
9. "Searching for something, darling? Perhaps some tips to be minimally interesting?"
10. "Is my facial expression explicit enough to let you know you're persona non grata in my visual space?"
11. "Now, let me rejoice counting all the times I warned you he was going to break your heart."
12. "I've asked about your day, not about your delusions of grandeur."
13. "Let's discuss my chances of abruptly end this conversation in the rudest way possible."
14. "Haven't you had enough of bullying people with your puns for the time being?"
15. "Oh please, do NOT hesitate to interrupt my peaceful reading session with your daily dose of BS."
16. "I dress to impress and to depress equal parts."
17. "Wanna play with the iron ball? Not sure if it's suitable for losers."
18. "Next time we meet, please make sure you don't attempt to murder me with your bad breath."
19. "Oh, is that a threat? You threatening me? Look at how I tremble."
20. "Off with the head of the simpleton who said less is more!"
21. "Take a seat and watch me become a goddess of sex."
22. "Tell me something: If you are so amusing, why I'm reaching brain death?"
23. "Taking PDA to a whole other level and giving zero fucks about it".
24. "So he calls me and he's like, "you'll never find someone like me." Then I'm like, "my goddamn point exactly!"
25. "Who said granite busts can't be good lovers? Who made these rules anyway?"
26. "Try to catch us, patriarchalism!"
27. "Yep, it's true, I'm drunk. I'm intoxicated with your lameness."
28. "I'm terribly sorry if my body confidence makes you uncomfortable and/or jealous."
29. "U mad?"
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