10 Reasons Why 90s Boy Bands Were Just Better

In a world of One Direction and The Wanted, it is easy to see that we have lost our way when it comes to memorable boy bands. Here's why we knew better in the 90s......

Boy bands suck, and yet we love them. Let’s face it, with the revival of boy bands such as One Direction and The Wanted, we are destined to be plagued with annoying yet catchy songs and an army of hormonally driven tweens screaming like erratic baboons for the next couple of years. With their success, I’m sure there will be even more boy bands to come. Having grown up in the 90’s, I am very familiar with the “boy band era”, and was personally excited to see it go. Now that it’s coming back like a bad case of herpes, I wanted to weigh the differences of boy bands from then and now. Do you know what I figured out? Today’s boy bands couldn’t touch 90’s boy bands! I do not understand One Direction or The Wanted’s appeal. 90’s boy bands like Backstreet Boys and N’Sync will live on forever on the guilty pleasure playlists around the world, a feat I doubt today’s boy bands will ever amount to. Don’t believe me? Well here’s a list of the top 10 reasons why 90’s boy bands were just plain better:

1. They had better names.

One Direction? Directing me towards where, awful music? The Wanted? Wanted for what, my money back? These names are just moronic. Now Backstreet Boys is a name I can get on board with. It gives them edge and makes you assume they hang out in streets and alleyways which is always cool. N’Sync simply promises me what I’m about to hear will at least be sung in unison, and I appreciate that information. 98 Degrees, New Kids On the Block, O-Town. The list goes on and on, but I assure you the names just made more sense. And they were better for cheering. I mean saying “Yay I love this Backstreet boys song!” sounds way better than “Yay I love this The Wanted song”. Try it, and you will agree with me.

2. They had better fashion.

Make fun all you want about 90’s fashion, but at least it was memorable. Every time any boy band was walking a red carpet their fashion was crazy and fun. Today’s boy bands just walk out on stage like they were just at a Nordstrom’s fashion show. Where’s the leather pant? Cowboy hats? Jumpsuits?! It just doesn’t feel right. We want costumes One Direction, not skinny jeans.

3. They were made in America.

Hear me out. I’m not against other countries and their talent. I mean my dream is to be British, so there’s that. However, both One Direction and The Wanted are foreign. It’s like we have to import our talent these days. There were TONS of boy bands in the 90’s and all of them were made in America. Where is our nation’s pride? Where are the American boy bands? Did we give up? In the 90’s you couldn’t walk without tripping over a boy band member. Even these days you can’t go to a fast food chain without seeing a former boy band member working there. I would feel better knowing that America is competing on all fronts and that includes boy bands.

4. They danced.

WHERE IS THE DANCING!?!?!? So I have never been to a One Direction show but I have seen their videos and they don’t dance. They sort of just run around pointing and smiling at the camera. Now when I was a young boy and watched N’Sync music videos, the dancing almost mattered more than the singing. I’m pretty sure good dancing was a pre-requisite to join the band.

5. They put on good shows.

Remember the old Video Music Awards? It was exciting to watch because all the performers put on great routines. Boy bands were no exception. Backstreet Boys would come out in crazy outfits and then shake what their mom’s gave them. All boy bands would incorporate water, fire, or some element that would make the performance even crazier. Today’s boy bands? Nope. They just come out on stage, walk around pointing, and awkwardly sing. It is so painfully boring I feel bad for the tweens who pay money to see them.

6. They individually stood out.

There was a routine with boy bands. There were usually 5 and they all had their parts to play. There was:

The hot one

The funny one

The bad boy

The shy one

And the one that looks like one of the other band member’s uncle

This was a fragile system that seemed to work on all levels. If you played your part, everything worked out. These days? I can’t even tell One Direction apart, and I’m not even sure how many members are in The Wanted. It’s like they don’t even care about the system. How can people tell who they like the best without this system? It is utter chaos. Seriously, who is who.

7. Fans made them enemies, which was awesome.

Who did you like more, Backstreet Boys or N’Sync? This question almost defined the 90’s. Fans of boy bands argued endlessly who was superior. I remember actually seeing two girls fist fight because they couldn’t settle this dispute (I went to a weird school). All the boy bands were stacked against each other in an all-out brawl between fans, and the competition was hilarious. The boy bands never seemed to fight themselves, which just shows how crazy fans can be.

8. The fans were better.

Maybe I’m just getting older, but One Direction’s fans are just plain annoying. And some of them seem super young to be claiming how hot the band is. Fans back in the day were very committed to their boy bands, even so much as to fight with opposing fans. They weren’t just crying over the band and their bodies, they were crying for the music. For some strange reason, people actually fell in love with the music. The lyrics spoke to people, way more than “That’s what makes you beautiful”.

9. They seemed age appropriate.

One Direction looks like a Toys “R” Us commercial, and The Wanted all look like they’re in their 30’s. Boy bands back in the day looked young enough to be cute yet old enough so it’s not creepy. Girls could lust after them without making sure a band member was at least 18. I don’t know if it was makeup or the clothing or just because it was the 90’s, but being in a boy band made you age appropriate.

10. They made better dating decisions.

Justin Timberlake dated Brittany Spears at her peak.

That Harry guy dated Taylor Swift.

I rest my case.

In conclusion, never forget the good times you had with 90’s boy bands. They brought great hits, memorable performances, crazy outfits, and sexy moves. But that time is over. We must accept this. Bringing back that boy band era would cause major damage to everyone’s psyche. I don’t think anyone can handle it. If One Direction and The Wanted must exist, than please learn some dance moves. You sicken me.

Written by: John Favinger