16 Unhelpful Life Lessons From Pinterest

Teach us, oh Pinterest, of life and love.

1. You should be eating tiny meals out of a mug.

Plates are for idiots. Take a hike, bowls!

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2. Stack your cookies and stack ‘em high.

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Gone are the days of horizontal cookie placement.

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3. You could easily put Anthropologie out of business.

Is that salmon roe?

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Anthropologie’s whole brand revolves around selling stuff that looks like it was made in a quirky person’s basement. Pinterest shows us we can all be that quirky person in a basement with its many “Anthro inspired/copycat” DIYs.

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4. There’s nothing that can’t be a terrarium.

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Tea cup? Great. Old TV? Perfect. Flower pot? GET OUT OF HERE.

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5. The key to losing weight is putting cucumber and other gunk in your water.

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Mmmm science.

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6. Almond milk, vanilla extract, baking cocoa, ice and a banana will taste identical to a Wendy’s Frosty.


Works best if you’ve never tried an actual Frosty before in your life.

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7. Children should be more stylish than you will ever be.

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8. Any hairstyle is possible with a minimum of 6,000 easy steps.

And after the 6,000th step and millionth bobby pin, it just ends up looking like a weird bun.

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9. Print out your Instagrams and bring them into the world.


Instagrams were meant to be touched, smelled, felt.

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10. You should expand your definition of the word “easy.”

“Easy Nail Art”

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“Easy Nail Art”

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“Easy Nail Art”

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11. A photograph of your coffee belongs in a museum.

I put my coffee in a drawer.


So artsy.

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12. The #1 rule of sandwich photography is ooze factor.


Also important: oozability, oozishness, and the oozing quotient.

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13. You should imitate the magic of chain restaurant food in your own home.

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You can recreate the experience of such culinary delights as KFC, Chili’s and Cracker Barrel without even putting on pants.

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14. Being physically able to pull your food apart is important.

Exert your physical power over food to really put it in its place.

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15. There’s no limit to what you can do with a baby’s foot.

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Hope you like paint on your foot, baby.

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16. Mason jars are God.

They are the Alpha and the Omega. There is nothing else.

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