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    20 Signs I'm Too Single

    As Valentines Day approaches, I'm yet again reminded that I'm truly very single.

    1. I'm writing this whilst drunk.

    2. Recently, the most excited I've got is when I cycled to the local Asda Store.

    3. I considered spending a long weekend in Paris...alone.

    4. My favourite pastime is watching Neighbours episodes...from 2002.

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    Neighbours Nerd / Via YouTube

    5. I find Nick Clegg really attractive.

    6. I listen to Billie Piper to remind myself of less stressful times.

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    emimusic / Via YouTube

    7. I hate sharing the bed with anyone.

    8. I find it funny when I learn a swear word...in French.

    9. I binge on Netflix but got depressed watching House Of Cards because of the Underwood power couple.

    10. The most important part of my day is my jog because it makes me feel alive.

    11. All my male friends have become my subconscious boyfriends.

    12. I constantly check my phone for notifications off various dating apps that I've signed up to.

    13. I get seriously emotional if someone has not got back to me in five minutes tops.

    14. I can name my favourite brands of chocolate numerically.

    15. I've read the Communist Manifesto in its entirety.

    16. I sing 'Tears Dry On Their Own' by Amy Winehouse in the mirror whilst dwelling on my past, unrequited loves.

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    AmyWinehouseVevo / Via YouTube

    17. I have a fervent passion for trying shop made wraps with fillings that descend from different cultures.

    18. I've considered joining a New Religious Movement several times to feel like I'm part of something.

    19. I enjoy paying visits to my old school teachers.

    20. And finally...I love birdwatching.