11 Hints That Your Roommate Is Richard Nixon

    Is your apartment home to Tricky Dick himself?

    1. Your roommate frequently invokes executive privilege to dismiss subpoenas and never takes out the trash. Classic!

    2. Your roommate sweats a lot, especially during the 1960 televised presidential debates with John F. Kennedy. Ugh!

    3. Your roommate was born in 1913 California to a Quaker family, and boy does it show come time to pay the rent!

    4. Your roommate called for the formation of the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA), yet vetoed the Clean Water Act of 1972 for budgetary excess, just one of many examples of internally conflicting liberal and conservative views toward domestic policy.

    5. Your roommate approved a secret bombing campaign in Cambodia and always leaves the bathroom sink a mess. G-R-O-S-S.

    6. Your roommate is called “Dick” by many people.

    7. Your roommate keeps going on about this “Pat” you’ve never met.

    8. Your roommate carried the United States into a tumultuous period of government review and voter distrust that would forever change the tone and tide of American politics.

    BUT also ultimately decided to forgo an executive coup in favor of restoring some semblance of a balance of power between the three branches.

    9. Your roommate can often be heard sleep-mumbling phrases like “Damn hippies” or “That jerk Woodward” or “I’m not a crook, mommy, and I don’t WANNA go to school.”

    10. Your roommate forgot to lock the door to your apartment last night, and was the 37th President of the United States.

    11. Your roommate's name is Richard Milhous Nixon.