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1. You have a very strong opinion on which Roman foundation myth is the best.
2. As well as who the true hero of the Iliad was.
3. The majority of your library has authors whose names end in -us, -o, or -es.
4. You're get mad when people make references to Nero fiddling while Rome burned.
5. When you want to feel superior to someone, you just call them a plebeian.
6. You get excited about every new myth-based movie.
7. But you know it's just going to be some masturbatory effort to get a Hollywood Adonis shirtless and oiled up.
8. Except for Gladiator. That movie was the shit.
9. Your friends are tired of you saying, "Do you want to know the derivation of that term?"
10. You know Shakespeare's The Comedy of Errors was just ripping off Plautus's Menaechmi.
11. But that's okay, because everyone knows that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
12. You have a favorite sculpture and have planned an entire trip around seeing it.
13. And a favorite emperor, whose entire life story you can recite from memory.
14. You know that the whole Julio-Claudian dynasty was more messed up than a daytime soap opera.
15. One of your summer's in college was spent on an archaeological dig in Europe.
16. There you learned that Indiana Jones does not do real archaeology.
17. But you love it anyway.
18. After four years, you're closer to your professors than most of your friends.
19. And have attended a...symposium...with them, that just happened to take place in a bar.
20. And your goal is to become a Classics professor yourself. You're majoring in your major so that, in the future, you can teach your major to new majors.
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