17 Things We Learned About British Politics In 2014

As we come to the end of 2014, we count down what we’ve learned about British politics in the last 12 months.

1. The people want owls

The source of a bizarre tweet suggesting that a Labour Government would give everyone their own owl is still unclear – party sources claimed the account was hacked, but twitter users were suspicious. Regardless, the pledge was welcomed by voters, and the internet spent the afternoon making ‘Owl Labour’ jokes. As Guido Fawkes commented, for more information about the Labour owl policy, ‘contact their press office on 28 28 20’.

2. Cameron has a ‘serious phone face’

In early March, the Prime Minister posted a photograph of himself on the phone to President Obama, stern-faced and talking about the Ukraine. ‘We are united in condemnation of Russia’s actions,’ he wrote. The selfie prompted a spate of copycat images, with Patrick Stewart swapping the phone for a tub of Wet Ones in his spoof tweet.

3. Alex Salmond has a doppelganger

In a potentially alarming soap-opera twist for Scottish politics, it emerged in early December that the former SNP Leader has a very convincing lookalike. Salmond, who met his lookalike John MacLeod in front of journalists at his constituency office, recently announced he is planning to run for a Westminster seat in 2015.

4. Nigel Farage is a ‘poundshop Enoch Powell’

In Russell Brand’s words, uttered when the two faced off on Question Time, anyway.

5. Be careful who you speak to in the park

Andy Warhol’s prediction that we’ll all enjoy five minutes of fame in our lifetime came true for software developer Gareth Edwards, who earned himself a mention in Miliband’s conference speech in September. Unhelpfully, Gareth turned out to be a lapsed Lib Dem, although on Newsnight he did at least concede ‘some of the things he said in his speech sounded quite sensible’.

6. White vans good, tweets of flag-covered houses bad

Michael Trolove / Via commons.wikimedia.org

Ed Miliband respects white vans. We know this because he felt it necessary to share said appreciation, in the wake of the outrage over former Shadow Attorney General and Islington MP Emily Thornberry’s fairly ambiguous tweet of a house in Rochester. The tweet – a photograph of one Dan Ware’s Rochester home – saw Thornberry booted out in record time, with Miliband keen to clarify that he felt nothing but veneration for the white van.

7. PMQs is no time to look peaky

George Osborne was caught on camera at PMQs in November looking less than his best. Mischievous commentators suggested his wan look was the result of a boozy night, although the suggestion of (Chancellor of the) Exchequer excess remains unconfirmed.

8. Remember the economy, stupid

Ed Miliband’s commitment to delivering speeches from memory backfired at the 2014 Labour Party Conference, when he managed to leave out an entire chunk of the prepared remarks. It might not have mattered, had the omitted section not covered the fiscal deficit; a gaffe that did little to calm concerns about Labour’s ability to handle the economy.

9. There is a royal purr

Alvesgaspar / Via commons.wikimedia.org

David Cameron was left red-faced after letting slip that the Queen was pleased with the result of the Scottish Independence Referendum, so much so that she ‘purred down the line’. He made the claim while speaking to former New York mayor Michael Bloomberg, not realising the he was still miked up. ‘One of those moments when you look back and kick yourself very hard,' he admitted.

10. Breastfeeding can be ostentatious

Or so said Nigel Farage, in a widely reported comment on LBC when asked about Claridge’s decision to ask a woman breastfeeding a baby to cover up. The UKIP team later backtracked, with Farage saying his point was about ‘good manners’. Twitter users made light of his remark, with the Spectator’s Isabel Hardman querying whether ostentatious breastfeeding involved ‘a small brass band and a neon sign’.

11. Bacon sandwiches are not safe to eat on camera

As Ed Miliband found out in May. Naturally, the internet had some photoshop fun at his expense.

12. Be careful where you go jogging

Was Cameron pounced on by a madman while on a walkabout in Leeds in October? At first it seemed as though a man called Dean Farley had launched a daylight attack on the Prime Minister, breaching security procedures; only later did it emerge that Farley was simply jogging in the wrong place at the wrong time. News outlets still raced to get an exclusive interview with him.

13. MPs can be entertaining

Penny Mordaunt’s harmless bet with her ex-colleagues in the navy led to the Communities Minister using an eyebrow-raising word more than once during a Commons debate in March. She noted that ‘the cause of hen and cock welfare is one raised with me by many constituents’. Not everyone was amused; Labour’s Kate Hoey criticised her for setting ‘a bad precedent’.

14. Hear’Say gets picked up

Since Labour came out in support of a mansion tax in February, celebrities and big names have been lining up to challenge it, with some of them – Griff Rhys Jones among them – even pledging to leave the country. But it was left to former popstar Myleene Klass to put the arguments against the tax to Ed Miliband, who she confronted on air during ITV’s The Agenda. But despite her suggestion that in London, £2m would only stretch ‘a garage’, Miliband came out on top, tweeting a link to a post: ‘Here’s why our NHS needs a mansion tax. It’s Pure and Simple', while internet users had fun at Klass's expense.

15. Watch who you direct message on twitter

It might be an undercover reporter. And they might share the rather private photograph you sent them with the world. Costing you your ministerial post. As Brooks Newmark MP found out.

16. Fictional characters have views on Scottish independence

YouTube / Via youtube.com

Groundskeeper Willie, of The Simpsons, made clear he supported the yes campaign in a special video. Unfortunately, as with his fellow independence supporter Sean Connery, his residence in America barred him from casting a vote.

17. Hardworking people enjoy playing bingo and drinking beer

As Danny Alexander said, the Conservatives’ post-Budget poster, signed-off and shared by party Chairman Grant Shapps, came across as just a tad ‘patronising’.