The 19 Steps Of Writing A Paper

If you started your paper when it was first assigned instead of the night before it was due, it wouldn’t have to be like this.

1. Step 1: Open Microsoft Word.

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2. Step 2: Write your name, the date, and the class at the top.

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3. Step 3: Think about how to start your paper.

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4. Step 4: Take a quick break.

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5. Step 5: Start your paper.

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6. Step 6: Take another quick break.

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7. Step 7: Start your paper but for real this time.

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8. Step 8: Use Wikipedia as a source even though your teacher specifically said not to.

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9. Step 9: Write a couple pages of garbage.

10. Step 10: Freak out when you realize the paper actually has to have, like, 10 pages or something.

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11. Step 11: Try making the margins smaller.

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12. Step 12: Or the font bigger.

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13. Step 13: Realize your teacher will notice both of those things and just add some extra spaces before and after the title.

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14. Step 14: Use synonyms to restate things you already wrote so you can make your paragraphs longer.

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15. Step 15: Remember you haven’t double-spaced yet, so it’s actually going to be long enough.

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16. Step 16: Do the bibliography in MLA format or APA format or whatever to prove to your teacher you didn’t use Wikipedia.

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17. Step 17: Spell-check.

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18. Step 18: Print.

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19. Step 19: Promise yourself you’ll never wait until the night before to start writing a paper ever again, and then rest.

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