1. Having to visit the local library every time you got homework was bad enough..
..without the inevitable despair of some kid beating you to it and clearing the shelves of ’Eyewitness Guides’
2. Typing out the web address to CBBC before realising you’d missed out a forward-slash and have to start all over again.
3. The unique horror of trainer shopping with a parent. Hi-Tec anyone?
4. Excitedly loading a free AOL CD-ROM into your disc drive before it slowly dawns on you that you’re still not on the Internet.
5. Pre-Google you’d end up typing Will Smith lyrics into search.com only for it to take you to a recipe website.
7. So you’re led into tempation by Accessories - Games, whereby this sight would undoubtedly be the highlight of your day.
8. Having to part with three weeks pocket money to afford a CD from Virgin Megastores.
9. Then getting home to play it on your DiscMan and having to stay perfectly still to stop it skipping.
10. You’d ring up your friend’s landline only for their mum to answer and conversationally blindside you.
13. And whilst we’re on the topic of annoying mascots, is that a letter you’re writing?
14. Back in the 90’s brand anxiety was rife. Two stripes = unacceptable, four stripes = unacceptable, three stripes = INCREDIBLY COOL.
15. If it was time for new school shoes then you’d better steer clear of this place if you wanted to have any friends at all.
16. And why did everyone else’s parents have a nicer car than yours?
17. Your nightlife was mostly restricted to consuming your body-weight in Haribo and Dr Pepper at sleepovers.
18. But God help you if you forgot your toothbrush.
19. Each Saturday night was a valiant battle to stay awake for Match of the Day.
20. But Channel 5 provided some discrete thrills.
(Except when the 10:50pm film cut straight to the next morning after a promising steamy build-up)
21. So you’d lie there staring at your glow-in-the-dark stars worrying about ghosts, UFOs and quicksand.
22. Being under the legal drinking age meant you were always perilously close to spending New Years in the company of Jools Holland. Anything but the Hootenanny.
23. And if you were taken to a pub the only way to feel grown-up was to order an Appletiser.
24. At school, accusations of being called a ‘glory-supporter’ were rife, especially if you were a Blackburn or Leeds fan.
26. Pre-alcohol Friday nights mostly involved watching endless repeats of Friends.
27. Actually that’s if you were lucky enough to have a TV in your room. Otherwise Ground Force with your parents was firmly on the Friday night menu.
28. As was 999, which terrorised your fragile brain and made sure you never went near a swimming pool / bonfire / cliff-edge again.
30. For a time, people legitimately wore baseball caps like this.
31. And you were led to believe that the more pockets your combats had, the cooler you were.
32. Of course the same rule applied to how much wet-look mousse you put on your curtains.
33. Which made you feel great until someone came along and tore apart your Adidas poppers.
34. But if all this got you down, at least this guy was always on hand to cheer you up.
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