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alexg15 10 months agoMy cover letter, complete with testimonials from fictional characters and dead folks. Hello, The name’s Alex Galbraith and you should take a moment and mark the date. You see, today is the day that your company officially pushed its swag points over 9000. Today, is the day it began the process of bringing me on as a Blogger. A few quick facts about me:.
* I have years of experience in entertainment editing and writing.
* I go hard in the journalistic paint.
* I have SEO experience and I am proficient in Office, Adobe Creative Suite, Final Cut Pro, Audacity, HTML and Wordpress.
* I have a B.A. in Communication with an emphasis in journalism from Flagler College.
* I might be a Highlander, certainly haven’t died yet. In short, I’m fantastic. And your company will be all the more fantastic (fantastic-er) for having me on board. But don’t take my word for it, listen to these satisfied customers. “I can honestly say Alex got me where I am today, which is dead” - Benjamin Franklin “His charm is overwhelming, his writing so passionate, his wit so damn pervasive, that he ACTUALLY made fetch happen” - Gretchen Weiners “Alex, please put your pants back on” - Society But, I know you. You aren’t the type to be swayed by the testimonies of a historical whorehound and the fictional leader of the Plastics. You need proof of my excellence. And I have kilos of pure, uncut proof stashed all over my resume, cover letter and clips (located here:http://www.wix.com/agalbrait6/portfolio) Go ahead. Take a gander (but be sure to put him back, wifey goose is cray.) Thanks for your time,
Alex Galbraith
Phone: (904) 540-5624
Email: agalbraith@alumni.flagler,edu -
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Apotheosis 11 months agoRoanald Dyorak is dating Katie Holmes now. He is the reason why she dumped Tom.
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Davine S. 11 months agoMisspelled “taupe”: you’re fired. If this guy had the charm and charisma of Ryan Gosling, he’d get hired on the spot with this email. If he had the social graces and arrogance of Dwight Schrute, he’d be shown to the door. It’s ALL about charisma. (And good looks, but you didn’t hear me say that because that’s not my personal ethic.)
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Holden Haas 11 months agoThat would get passed around our whole office, he would be brought in for an interview, and never ever hired.
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drewdistilled 11 months agoThe guy’s name is Roanald Dvorak. Here’s his Twitter page https://twitter.com/roanalddvorak
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