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1. You give the policeman who pulled you over "cigarette money"
2. You would never eat fried egg (or anything, really) without kecap manis
3. You do your shopping in Singapore. Occasionally Hong Kong or Bangkok.
4. You get excited when someone you know is coming back/visiting from the United States. Even if you barely know them.
5. You grew up eating rice three times a day
6. And you prefer eating it with your bare hands
7. You miss your maid during laundry day
8. This is staple food
9. And you know 1001 ways to cook it
10. You've freaked out at least once because the internet connection is so damn slow
11. Your reaction when you see a bule
12. You've been driving since you were 12
13. So your legit government issued ID says you're 5 years older than you really are
14. But buying alcohol without ID was never a problem anyway
15. You have an extraordinary skill when it comes to driving
Because...
16. You or someone you know have consulted a dukun
17. You're used to sleeping in cars because... DRIVER
18. You pay to use the bathroom in the mall
19. You buy all the most expensive brands because of gengsi
20. Your main purpose in life is to get a wife/husband that’s rich, from a “good” family, and most importantly good looking in order to “memperbaiki keturunan”
21. You miss nasi goreng, bubur ayam, mi ayam, and sate kambing more than anything
22. You bought a set of exam questions from your teacher for $100 because you just don't want to study
23. You prefer to call cheating on a test as "kerja sama" (work together)
24. You've tried to get excused from "upacara"
25. You have so many complains about the country but at the end of the day, it is where your heart is
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